Karma Is A Funny Thing
by xKumax
Summary: Leo, Raph, Don and Mikey, all come up against something very alien to them, a female turtle. But which brother will she end up picking? And what does Baxter Stockman have to do with her? And why does she seem to have such a strange name? **Complete**
1. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles?

Author notes- I do not own the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles or any of their compadres. This is my first story, feel free to give any criticisms, but try to be as kind as possible!

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles?

"That Stockman, I'm gunna-"

I start to wake up, and hear an angry, unfamiliar voice as I do.

"Shush, you don't wanna wake her up Raph." A more calming but still unfamiliar voice says. I hear a sigh.

'_Both of the voices are male, but who are they? And Stockman? Neither of them sound like Stockman. Oh jeez, why is he the only thing I remember?' _The memory of his sneering face in bedded into my brain. I slowly open my eyes to escape from the awful memory.

I roll over onto my side and my dark, waving hair drapes over my neck. I glance around at the room and realise this is unlike anywhere I've been before. The walls are orange, from what I can make out of the dim light, and there are scrolls neatly spaced around the walls, with some other language painted upon them. There are also two swords, crossing each other on the wall next to the bed. I frown, '_where the hell could I be?!'_

As I try to sit up, my head spins, my ankle throbs with pain and my wrist feels bulky. I groan and lay back onto the cosy bed, looking at my heavily bandaged wrist. I finally register the figures in the doorway. I frown and one of them speaks again.

"Hmm, too late, I think she's awake." One of the figures moves, but I can't figure out what he looks like, the light's too dim.

"Hey, are you awake?" A gruff voice asks, and the other figure in the doorway moves too. I think he was leaning on the doorframe, but now he moves into the room.

"I think so, unless I'm dreaming…" I say softly, holding my head.

"Can we put the light on?" He asks me.

"Yeah okay." I realise my mistake just as I finish speaking. '_Surely they know I'm a mutant, a mutant turtle to be precise, but how are they gunna react? They'll probably recoil in horror… but why would they let me have a bed if they were repulsed by me? This is too much thinking for my throbbing head…' _ I pull the covers over my head and close my eyes as I hear a switch turned on.

"Your head hurt huh?" I feel the bed sink beside me as I get asked. My heart hammers at my chest so hard, I'm certain whoever is sitting next to me can hear it.

"Yeah." My voice comes out as a squeak.

"Not scared of us are ya?" The same voice asks.

"Why wouldn't I be?" I say trying not to sound as pathetic.

"There's no reason to be scared of us." The other voice says.

"If you're not Stockman, I guess not, but…"

"But what?" The gruff voice says.

"But… you know what I am… what are you gunna do to me?"

Neither of them speaks, and I feel they must be exchanging looks.

"We don't quite understand… what would we do to you?"

"An' will ya quit hidin' already?"

I quiver under the covers, '_I've gotta face it sometime… but why does it have to be now?'_

I pull the covers back from my face, eyes still tightly closed, then breathe in deeply. I open my eyes and look to my bedside. I freeze, too shocked to speak. '_Two mutant turtles… like me? No, wait, two male mutant turtles like me? How could it be?!'_

"Ahh I see what's goin' on here." The turtle by my bedside talks.

"Y-y-you do?" I stutter, stunned still.

"Yeah…" He looks up at the other turtle, hovering by the door, a serious look on his face, "You're just _so_ amazed by my good looks." He looks back at me, a huge grin replaces the serious look. The other turtle rolls his eyes and smiles.

"You can only wish you had that effect upon the opposite sex Raph," the smile disappears from his face, "she's probably as amazed as us finding another mutant turtle."

"Well, uh, you got it in one… but who are you? How are you turtles? Where do you come from? I never saw any male mutant turtles in Stockman's lab… At least I don't think I did…" I muse half to myself, desperately trying to clutch at any memories to do with any other turtles.

"I guess we'd better take this from the beginnin', eh Donny?" The one sitting on the bed gets up, stretching his back.

"Looks like it." The other turtle, I'm guessing he's called Donny, agrees.

"Well, first off, I'm Raph, an'-"

"Raphael actually." The other turtle interrupts him, smiling and Raphael frowns at him.

"An' this is my brother Donatello, but don't call me Raphael, unless ya want an ass kickin' like Don seems ta want."

The gruff nature of Raphael makes me slightly uneasy, but I feel that he's only joking. He's about a few inches taller than me I guess, but extremely muscley. He wears something red around his eyes, I think it's a ninja mask… '_Why do I know what a ninja mask is?…'_ and he wears a belt, with two weapons tucked into it. It startles me slightly, and I hope he doesn't want to use them on me.

Donatello seems a lot easier going. A bit taller than Raphael, and not as muscley as him either. If I'm right, he wears a purple ninja mask around his eyes, but I can't see a weapon in his belt. This makes me relax slightly, but I guess if they were gunna hurt me, they wouldn't be explaining things to me.

"We're brothers, if you couldn't tell, and we've got two others." Donatello says.

"That's me, I'm a brother!" Another turtle looks over Donatello's shoulder, grinning wildly.

"This is Michelangelo, or Mikey." Donatello introduces him as he steps into the room, as well as another turtle. Michelangelo has an orange ninja mask around his eyes, whilst the other turtle has a blue one. The small room starts to get crowded and I cringe slightly, remembering clearly that I hate crowds.

"I'm Leonardo," The turtle with the blue mask on speaks, "I guess you're as confused about all this as much as we are. We'll explain things to you later on, but is there anything you remember whilst it's fresh in your memory?"

"Uhhh…" I close my eyes trying to block out the crowded room.

"Leo, I think you might be asking a bit much." I hear Donatello's voice say.

"Yeah, right, sorry…" I feel the bed sink as Leonardo sits next to me. I open my eyes and I feel less intimidated as Leonardo has sat on the bed, and Michelangelo has sat on the floor.

"I-I… I don't remember anything except… except Stockman." I look into Leonardo's brown eyes.

"Anything?" He knits his brow in thought.

"No… just… yeah, just Stockman." I look around at the three other brothers, who as look as confused as Leonardo.

"That's… strange." Donatello frowns.

"I guess, I haven't helped much…" I look down at the bed.

"It's fine, I guess we'll have to help you remember…" Leonardo pauses as if he's waiting for something. When I don't answer, he asks softly, "What's your name?"

"My… my name?" I frown once again. _'I remember Stockman's name… and of course, the turtle's names, but my own… what is it?'_ . "I-… I don't know." I look up, feeling tired from trying to snatch memories from my blank brain.

"Amnesia." Donatello says.

"In English please, brainiac." Raphael looks towards him.

"When you lose your memories, temporarily, or… permanently… it's called amnesia…" Donatello looks at me. I sigh, exasperated_. 'Why can't I just go back to sleep?'_

"How about we talk about things we know about, instead of dwelling on those which we don't." Leonardo says.

"Yeah… please tell me, it might jog my memory, how you came to be turtles… it's… very baffling."

"Well, it started 16 years ago…" I hear another voice, not one of the turtles. They step aside and a rat walks into the room, my eyes widen_. 'Another mutant?'_ "Please forgive me, I overheard your conversation, and you seem to be very confused. I have most likely confused you more, not only giant talking turtles, like yourself, but a giant talking rat." His old face creases into a smile. "My name is Splinter, the one responsible for these ruffians, but I assure you, we mean you no harm. Please, let me tell you the story of our origin…" Splinter comes to sit on my bedside, and all four turtles, sit on the floor, looking up at him intently. I breathe out deeply and prepare to listen.


	2. Memories

Author notes- I do not own the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles or any of their compadres.

Kyabetsu- Merry Christmas, my present to you is 2 more chapters! Thanks for all the help.

RubyFireGem- Merry Christmas! My present to you too is 2 more chapters, sorry it might leave you in suspense still!

Memories.

I wake up and stretch. I lay in a bed for a while, thoughts running through my head about the past few days. I still can't remember anything, and with each day it frustrates me more. I decide to get up and have some breakfast. I carefully make my way down the crude stairs and hear Donatello working in his lab. I see no sign of Michelangelo, he's probably still in the bed as the laziest and youngest turtle, well, youngest apart from me. Leonardo is nowhere to be seen either, but he is probably out training on the rooftops whilst it's still early.

"Mornin' pipsqueak." Raphael says as I limp into the kitchen of the turtle's strange lair.

"Morning Raphael." I grin shyly at the nickname the boys have come up for me in absence of my real name.

"Ya can call me Raph yanno." He says then drinks the last of his mug of tea.

"Okay."

"How's the ankle?" He asks pushing his chair back from the table.

"Still sore," I carefully walk over to the table, "but Donatello said walking would help a sprain."

Donatello seemed to act the doctor around the lair, being as smart as he was, even though he insisted he was only an engineer.

"Yeah, brainiac's prob'ly right."

Leonardo walks into the room, heading straight to make a cup of tea.

"Hey, feeling any better?" he smiles at me.

"Yeah thanks." I smile back.

"Started to remember anything?" Donatello comes into the kitchen and waits for Leo to finish using the kettle so he can make a cup of coffee.

"Not yet. I can't believe I only remember Stockman…" I say glumly.

"Maybe goin' back ta the lab we found ya in would jog yer memory?" Raphael gets up from his chair and gestures I can have it. I gladly take it, carefully sitting down and resting my ankle.

"Or bring back repressed memories that would be better off staying where they are?" Donatello shrugs.

"Besides, if we get ambushed or anything, you can't exactly help us out on the fighting front, you might even get hurt, and we don't want that." Leo cups his hands around his cup of tea and looks at me.

"But I can't even remember my name, how ridiculous!" I cry out and sigh.

The three brothers look around at each other.

"It's frustrating for you, isn't it?" Leonardo says sympathetically, and sits next to me.

"Yeah…" I sigh. '_How stupid have you gotta be to forget your own name? I don't wanna be called pipsqueak forever.'_

"Maybe a few of us could go back for you? Try to find something that might remind you without bringing back horrific memories back at the same time?"

"That'd be great Donatello." I grin.

He smiles shyly, "Okay, but you can call me Don."

"Okay." I grin at him again, finding it funny I managed to make him go shy.

"Well," Leonardo puts his cup of tea down, "I guess you're busy though Don? I'll go down there to try and find something." He gets up.

"Well, I ain't busy Leo." Raphael grins at his brother who seems reluctant to let Raphael tag along. Leonardo sighs.

"Raph, don't let your temper get the best of you, okay? We don't need that, this is a stealth mission, not a 'let's see how many guys heads we can bust open' mission." He looks sternly at his grinning brother. "We'll be back when we can." Leonardo says, then he and Raphael exit the kitchen. Donatello shakes his head, grinning to himself slightly.


	3. Karma

Author notes- I do not own the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles or any of their compadres.

-Please excuse me if I completely messed up on the Japanese later on in the chapter. Please feel free to correct me if I've got it wrong. & for the record "imouto" is "younger sister" & "ani" is "older brother"… or at least I think!-

Karma.

I sit on the sofa, nursing a cup of sweet coffee, whilst watching Mikey and Donatello compete in a video game. I giggle to myself as Mikey, without taking his eyes from the multiple TV screens, punches Donatello in the arm to distract him. With quick reflexes, Donatello smacks Mikey around the back of the head. His lapse in full concentration on the game gives Mikey the chance to beat him. The energetic young turtle jumps up, and starts to dance and whoop.

"I beat you! I beat your ass good Donny!" The grin stretches across Mikey's face as he looks down on his older brother. Donatello gives him an unimpressed look, and gets up, Mikey following him, joking and teasing at 'how much you completely suck'. I look down into my cup grinning.

"Hey Leo, guess who's ass I completely kicked, it was Donny's, Donny's ass got completely kicked Raph, it was-… what's up with you?" Mikey's voice goes from mocking to deadly serious. I place my coffee down on the table in front of me and turn around to see both Leonardo and Raphael looking stony-faced, the only difference being Leonardo is the only one to give me eye contact.

"Did you find anything Leo?" Donatello asks. Leonardo breaks his eye contact to look at Donatello, then back to me.

"Just this." He takes off his rucksack, and rustles in it to pull out a long chain, with a tag hanging from it. He walks over to me and puts it in my hand, then looks down to the floor. I look at the metal coiled in my hand, then look at the tag. Engraved on the one side, "Female, 12/08/92, experiment 126." and as I flip it over, the other side is engraved with a single word, "Karma."

"Karma?… My name…" I mutter softly, more to myself than the guys. I close my eyes, and a memory flashes back to me...

"_Here you go, my precious." Stockman says, putting a long chain with a tag hanging from it around my neck. He guides me over to a mirror and strokes my dark hair. "You have a name, you're one of us now that you're useful to us. You will be my pride and joy, Karma…"_

My eyes fly open and Leonardo looks at me concerned. I sit heavily on the sofa.

"I'm goin' in the shower." I hear Raphael mutter gruffly behind me, and then the patter of his feet on the metal stairs. I pick up the necklace and put it around my neck.

"I guess it's all I've got, hey?" I force a smile to try and ease Leonardo's worries. He nods sullenly.

"Karma, not as much as a mouthful as Michelangelo!" Mikey grins, trying to lighten the mood. His bright grin fails to do the job.

"I'll be in my lab if anybody wants me." Donatello says quietly.

"Okay Don." Leonardo says equally as quiet.

"I'm gunna, uh… I'll be in my room." Mikey makes his excuses, and I hear the rattle of the metal staircase again, but instead of walking up it like his brother, Mikey climbs it.

"Are you okay?" Leonardo touches my shoulder, and I flinch violently at his soft touch. He draws his hand back.

"Sorry!" I look up at him worriedly but he smiles kindly back, slightly forcefully.

"Bad memories?"

I look down at my bandaged wrist and start to pick at some of the lose threads from the dressing.

"I wouldn't know… just… when you gave me the necklace, it just brought back the first time I was given it." I push my hair back, but it falls across my face. I feel Leonardo's body shudder as he exhales heavily.

"I wish we knew how to help, but not even Donny, the brains of the family, seems to know how to."

"Just… keep me safe Leonardo, that's all I ask."

"What do you mean?" He questions. I look up at him, and look into his brown eyes. I can only bare it for a few seconds, and look back down.

"Keep me safe from Stockman… I know I can't remember, but my senses are telling me he was bad news."

"We will Karma, our whole family promise that with our honour, and that's as strong of a promise you can get from us." I nod, my heart feeling as heavy as lead, thumping at my chest slowly. "I'll get Donny and Mikey to help me clear out the spare room so you can have your own privacy. For now, you can go in my room if you like, I won't disturb you and I'll make sure nobody else does either."

"Thank you Leonardo."

"Call me Leo."

I look up at him and smile, feebly.

"Thank you… Leo."

"What's with calling us by our full names anyway?"

"I dunno, just seems more polite. The nicknames seem like more of a… private thing."

Leo smiles, "trust me, call us by our nicknames, you'll get sick of the mouthful of 'Leonardo' before long... What about Mikey though? You don't call him by his full name."

"He's just too cute for 'Michelangelo'. 'Mikey' is cute, it suits him, I can't really help it."

He smiles in thought, "If you say so." He gets up. "I'll see you later, _imouto_."

"See you later…" I frown in thought, "_ani?_"

Leo looks at me surprised, then makes his way upstairs.

'Wow, I know Japanese.' I think to myself


	4. A heart to heart with Raphael?

Author notes- I do not own the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles or any of their compadres.

A heart to heart… with Raphael?!

I sit in my new, completely bare room on my new, extremely comfortable bed. I bite at my lip, not knowing what to do with myself. I start to play with my hair absent-mindedly, and sing to myself softly, wondering where I manage to pluck the song lyrics from. I curse my amnesia and sigh. Going over to the crude mirror, propped up on a desk donated from Don, I smile as I remember what Mikey said to me.

"_You're a girl, you need a mirror! Girls love mirrors and lookin' at themselves, the amount of time Raph spends lookin' at himself in the mirror, I doubt his masculinity… but then he'll scratch himself and I'll think to myself, 'he's a dude… or a damn ugly girl with no freakin' shame' ha ha ha!"_

Leo smacked him around the back of the head and frowned. 

"_Mikey! Language, she's a girl, she doesn't want to hear that vulgarity." _

"_And anyways Mikey, I worry for you if you watch Raph in the bathroom." Don grins and Leo breaks a smile and 'hi threes' his brother._

I grin fondly at the memory from only half an hour ago. I lie on my bed, staring up at the ceiling when there's a hard knock at the door. I get up and open the door, expecting it to be Mikey for the third time with his phrase of the night, 'Look! We're neighbours!' and him grinning wildly. I open the door to see not the orange banded brother, but the red banded brother, Raphael.

"Oh, hey Raphael." I say slightly nervously.

"Weren't expectin' me huh?" He grins.

"Uh, no, I was expecting it to be that weirdo, Michelangelo." I shout and a loud "Hey!" comes from the next room. I grin, and then realise I'm in Raphael's company. I look up at him meekly and he grins at me.

"Yanno he prob'ly hated bein' called 'Michelangelo' more than bein' called a weirdo."

I grin and realise my bad manners. I open the door wider so Raphael can come in. I take a deep breath.

"Any reason for dropping by?" I sit on my bed, stiffly.

"I just wanted ta see yer dig, seein' I was too busy bein' grumpy earlier." He says whilst glancing round. "Sorry 'bout that by the way."

"It's fine, you'll have to get used to it with me too, I'm not the most pleasant person of a morning." I grin & then curse myself. _'Shut up! He doesn't wanna know!'. _

"Heh, me either." Raphael goes over to the desk, running his fingers lightly over the top of it, then glances in the mirror. I grin to myself as Mikey's dig at his brother comes back to me again.

"So…" I start, not exactly knowing what I'm going to say. Raphael looks up at me expectantly and my brain panics. "Three brothers, I guess that's interesting!"

He chuckles and leans against the desk, "Interestin' is the right word. Want one? Ya can have Mikey, jeez, we've been tryin' ta give him away for years!"

I smile and look up at him. "Oh, so ya do have a smile, I'd been wonderin'."

"What do you mean?" I frown & wonder to myself, _'That sounds like an insult!'_

"You're forever grinnin', like the weirdo in the next room… it's nice seein' a smile fer a change." He says gently, unlike his fiery nature.

I blush and look down at my wrist.

"Thanks." I mutter and start picking at the threads of the bandages again.

"I…" Raphael starts and I look up at him, expectantly, like he did to me a few minutes ago, "Are you okay?" He changes his mind.

"Yeah, thanks… are you?"

"Yeah… I just…" He rubs the back of his neck, nervously, his big grin disappearing. "I'm worried."

"About what?"

"Ya should be askin' 'bout who, that'd be more accurate." He half mutters, and looks up to see my face contorted in confusion. He sighs. "I'm worried 'bout ya Karm, ya seem… so unhappy an' fragile."

"I guess I am right now… I don't know what to make of all this. I could be dreaming and I'd have to be back in Stockman's lab." I hunch my shoulders up.

"Ya ain't dreamin', trust me, there are other mutant turtles out there, one of 'em is standin' in front of ya, worryin' the shell off his back for ya too." Raphael looks at me solemnly.

"You have no reason to worry, I'll be fine."

"That's what worries me, I want ya ta be fine right now… Stockman…" Raphael stops leaning against the desk and turns away from me slightly. "If I ever get hold of him, he won't be _walkin'_ away from me…"

"Why are you so mad?"

Raphael's body seems to shake, with anger or sorrow, I'm not quite sure.

"Your wrist… Karm… it wasn't damaged when the lab collapsed, it was already bandaged when we found you. Donny seems to think it was broken. He took the bandages off an' had a look, the bruisin' an' swellin' had gone down a lot, so it'd prob'ly been broken a good few weeks. He seemed ta think… that… well, he thought…" Raphael finds it hard to say, "He thinks it was broken by force, not by a fall… by a human…" He looks up at me, anger and hurt swirling in his brown eyes. I look down at my wrist and try to remember any recollection of Stockman hurting me. Nothing comes to my head.

"I don't remember." I whisper. Raphael comes over and sits next to me. I lean against his arm and he puts it around me. I cuddle into his side, feeling safe in his strong arms. He seems a bit taken back, but holds me safe.

"Raphael, please keep me safe…" I say, trying to hold back tears burning at my eyes.

"Karm, ya need ta know two things 'bout me. First off… I hate bein' called Raphael, I only get called that if I'm in trouble, which is a lot." He lifts my head up and grins at me which makes me smile feebly. "So call me Raph… an' the second thing... as long as I'm alive, I will always keep those who I care 'bout safe, even if it does cost me my own life." He says the last bit softly and quietly.

"I… thank you…" I look back down at my wrist, resting in my lap. "I don't know how to repay any of you guys for what you've done for me… I wish I could." I say it sullenly, but the innuendo of that sentence crosses my mind. I grin slightly. I look up at Raphael grinning too. "Hey! Not like that!" I say, putting on a mock shocked face.

"Heh heh, sorry, can't help it, that's how my brain works."

"Good, it's how mine works too." I grin up at him.

"Damnit, I thought I mighta offended ya then, ya worried me."

"I seem to worry you a lot."

"Mm, ya do, an' ya better stop it, otherwise I'll end up wrapped around yer little finger." He gets up.

"Would that be such a bad thing?" I grin and he rolls his eyes and makes his way to the door.

"Night Karm."

"Night Raph." I say as he leaves, glancing at me one last time to wink. I blush just as he closes the door.

I hear Mikey's singsong voice come from outside, most likely winding up Raph, and then Raph's roar as he tells Mikey 'if ya make one more reference ta me gettin' laid, I'm gunna **lay** yer sorry shell in the way of an 18 wheeler'. I laugh to myself and pull back the blankets of my bed. I snuggle down, and drift off to sleep, thoughts of the brothers drifting around my head like the previous nights.


	5. Leo, Raph, Mikey and Don

Author notes- I do not own the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles or any of their compadres.

Leo, Raph, Mikey and Don.

_Okay, I admit it, I was one lucky girl turtle. Four guy turtles all trying to get my attention. I felt bad, because they were brothers and I didn't want them falling out on my account, but at the same time, it made me laugh a lot watching them all compete with one another._

_Leo, he is definitely the most subtle on trying to get my attention. He offers to do certain things for me, like when he offered to go Stockman's lab by himself. Of course, Raph must have sensed what Leonardo was trying to do, and offered to go along. __Donatello explained Raphael's actions and I joined in with him, grinning also. But Leo is a sweet guy and I know he's protective of me, even though I'm confused in what way he is. Am I like a little sister? He did call it me after all, but in Japanese which means he must have been masking it. Maybe he meant it as something more?_

_Talking of Raphael, he makes me laugh, a lot, he enjoys ribbing his brothers, I think maybe to show off a little bit. He's really charming and caring too, even if he comes across gruff. Though I've seen his infamous temper, it doesn't really put me off him, as long as he doesn't turn around and shout his head off at me, I'm not sure I'd be able to handle it. I think Raph gets angry when Stockman is mentioned though, like real anger, 'he won't be walkin' away from me…' I remember him saying. He seems protective too, though I'm not sure in what kind of way either. _

_Mikey, as he insists to be called, makes me laugh the most though. Raphael is funny, but I can't really help but laugh when Mikey winds him up, with a big cheeky grin on his face. Mikey is normally the one to make Raph shout his head off, but in true cheeky fashion, he just grins wildly, shrugging off the insults being thrown his way. He's the cheekiest of the brothers, and tries to get my attention by being the loudest. I think with Mikey, he's glad that I'm not older because otherwise we wouldn't play silly games together and I wouldn't put up with his constant jokes. We get on really well, seeing as his brothers aren't really ones for being silly like us. _

_Then there's Donatello, the shy, quiet and extremely sweet brother. Whilst he fights the least for my attention, he gets it the easiest. We talk together quite a lot, he is the easiest to talk to after all and I talk a lot when I'm not being shy. He is also extremely good at making coffee as I found out at breakfast. He makes sure I'm okay, I'm not sure if that's his sweet side, or his doctor side coming out. Either way, he looks after me too. They all look after me in their own ways though I guess._

_They're all ninja, and take their training very seriously, Leonardo especially. He loves his katana, his weapon of choice. They are very beautiful weapons, though Mikey's are easily the coolest, nunchucks. He's let me have a few spins with them, something Leo would not approve of, as in his eyes, untrained hands are a dangerous combination with weapons. Raphael chooses sai, which in my eyes are the most dangerous and brutal out of the weapons, probably to match his sometimes brutal nature. Don uses a bo staff, a very elegant weapon, but something he chooses not to carry around with him all the time, it makes it difficult for him to sit down. (Hence the first time I woke up in Leo's room, I saw weapons on Raphael's person but not Don's.)_

_As I said, I am a very lucky girl turtle to have such wonderful guys take me into their home and fall over each others feet for me. But… as funny and humbling it is, it's not fair on them. I guess I'll have to come to a decision soon. I just wish it was an easy decision to make. I need some help._


	6. Humans

Author notes- I do not own the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles or any of their compadres.

Humans...

The knock at the door wakes me from my slumber and I groan as I roll onto my left side to look at the door.

"Come in." I say sleepily, huddling my shoulders and rubbing my eyes. Don comes in, smiling sweetly, a purple mug in his hands.

"Good morning Karm."

"Morning Don." I sit up and pat my bedside. He sits down and hands me the mug.

"I made you some coffee, you seemed to enjoy it yesterday."

"Ooh thank you." I take the cup gratefully, grin at the purple banded brother and sip at the warm, sweet liquid. I close my eyes and lick my lips.

"Is it okay?"

"Mm it's lovely." I open my eyes and grin whilst Don smiles at me.

"Good." He glances at my wrist. I sigh and put down the coffee on the table by my bedside. "Raph told me." I hold my wrist.

"I told him not to." Don frowns. "From the sounds, I don't think remembering your past would help you an awful lot. It might bring on night terrors, flashbacks, really unpleasant things, you may not have amnesia, it might just be repressed memories, even though you did hit your head… hmm, maybe-"

"Don," I grin, interrupting his mumbling, "you talking to me or yourself?"

He looks up, his head still twirling with thoughts, then smiles and laughs at himself slightly.

"I'm sorry, I get carried away."

"I noticed. It's fine, I'll be okay. As you said, it might be better not to know." I shrug, picking up my cup of coffee.

"Hmm."

"Anyway, I did wanna talk to you, I'm glad you brought me some coffee."

"You 'wanna'?" Don smirks.

"Huh?" I frown.

"Don't you mean, 'want to'?"

"Umm, oh yeah, sorry." I get embarrassed slightly but Don just grins.

"You're saying sorry to a bunch of New Yorkers who talk like that anyway? I was wondering if you were always gunna be so well spoken if you were living with us." I smile at him. "Sorry, you wanted to talk?"

"Oh yeah." I rub my face. "I'm not quite sure how to say this, but… well, clearly you and your brothers have never met a girl of your kind, and I'm kind of wondering what you all think of me because I don't want to cause any problems."

"Well, I know I can speak for myself completely accurately and… well Karm, you're lovely and…" Don stops to think how to say it, blush rising to his cheeks as he does, "you're very pretty and I'd love to have somebody there for me, but… you're not the one for me."

"Phew, I'm kind of glad of that Don, you're like my big brother." I smile up at him.

"And you're like my little sister."

"Your _imouto_?" I ask.

"Yeah, my _imouto_." He smiles, not seeming surprised by my knowledge.

"What about your brothers? What do you think they think of me?"

"Hmm, well Mikey I'm pretty sure doesn't have a crush on you… he thinks your hot though." Donny grins and I laugh.

"Mikey all over!"

"Exactly." He looks up at the ceiling in thought, "Raph, I'm not so sure, since he hides most of his feelings away anyway, but since you've been here, he's… calmer I guess. More polite, more conversational… in fact… have you brainwashed my brother? I want the hot head back, a calm Raph is a scary thing." I laugh again. "I think, as un-Raph-like as this sounds, he might be _shy_." Don almost whispers the last bit, as if he's afraid of saying it, just in case Raph hears.

"Hmm, okay, well, that clears things up a bit, but the brother confusing me the most… Leonardo…"

Don looks at me in thought, his brown eyes flickering. "Leo… he's… well, I'll put it bluntly, difficult. Sensei must think Raphael is the most difficult son, or Mikey, and at times, he must think I'm difficult, always tinkering, always tired for practise staying up half the night, but… Raph can go off and blow steam instead of shouting his head off, Mikey can play his games instead of bouncing around down here and I can let things rest, even myself, at times… Leo, he pushes everyone away, carries the weight of the world on his shoulders, keeps things to himself and that, in my opinion, is the most difficult thing to put up with. He's hard to read, and I'm sorry Kar, I can't seem to give you an answer on our good brother Leonardo."

"Hmm." I take in all of Don's information, playing it through in my brain. "Okay Donny, thank you."

"Is that all that was on your mind?"

"Yeah… oh no, wait, something else…" I grin.

"What?" Don seems wary of what I'm going to say.

"You guys do know you pretty much walk around naked all the time?"

Don laughs and blushes slightly, "Well, we've never had a reason to cover up, and we hate clothes! We don't understand humans wearing them."

"I don't understand humans full stop."

"Me either sometimes, but if you like, I'll see if April can get you something to fit if you feel slightly conscious. We have no shame, but you are a female after all."

"Who's April?" I ask, being the wary one this time.

"Our friend."

"Another turtle?" I frown.

"No no, as we said, you're the only one we've ever come across, April is… a human friend."

My eyes widen, horrified.

"Human friend?! Are you completely damn crazy?!"

"Look, Kar, she's okay, we found her in the sewers… a few days before you come to think of it… She was unconscious, we had few options, bringing her out of harms way was the best one we had." He shrugs.

"Is she here?" I ask, my heart hammering at my chest like a drumstick against a drum.

"No, she has her own place."

"But she knows where you live right?"

"Kar, calm down please, we knew the risks of trusting April, but she's nice, and trustworthy-"

"You could handle the whole world knowing about you? Finding you, chasing you out, torturing you, putting you in cages, breaking your arms-" All these thoughts running through my mind all at once.

"Kar." Don puts his hands firmly on my shoulders. "It's okay, I promise you."

"I don't take promises lightly Donatello."

"Neither do I. You're safe. I promise you."

I sigh and nod, looking into the brown eyes of my brother.

"I believe you."

"Okay, good. C'mon, Mikey is probably wrecking the kitchen, making breakfast."

As Don and I descend the stairs, the worry still lays heavy in my mind. I manage to smile as I see Mikey's big grin as we go into the kitchen.

"Good mornin'!" He says cheerfully, an apron tied around his waist.

"Morning Mike." Don goes straight over to the kettle.

"Morning." I say, sitting down at the table.

"Kar, you're lookin' a bit on the skinny side, so you get a special Mikey breakfast!" He turns his back to me, picks something up and turns back to me with a plate piled high with pancakes. I gasp.

"That's breakfast?!"

"Yup, and all yours." He sets it in front of me. Donny smiles as he sees my eyes widen in awe. Raph comes into the kitchen whistling, but when he sees my face, he stops to laugh.

"What's up with you littl'un?" He takes a seat next to me.

"That," I point at the monstrous meal in front of me, "is my breakfast."

"Yeah, Mikey special, pancakes, chocolate sauce, strawberries, crushed hazelnuts, it's damn good." Raph says calmly.

"But… it's huge!"

"Why thank you Karmy, I know it is." Mikey grins then winks at me. I smile, my cheeks flushing slightly as Don and Raph laugh at my expense.

"Don't eat all of it if you can't, Mikey ate one twice the size of that one once & went back to bed all day." Donny cups his coffee in his hands.

"Are you sure it's okay for me to have all that?" I ask biting my lip.

"Pssh, Karm, shut up and eat it." Mikey turns back to the frying pan, where he cracks an egg on the side of it. I pick up the knife and fork tucked underneath the bottom layer of pancakes and cautiously cut into the top pancake. I pick up a fork full of chocolate and nut covered pancake and a small strawberry and put it in my mouth as elegantly as I can, but still manage to drip sauce over my chin. I wipe it off whilst chewing and swallowing the food. As I put my knife and fork down everybody looks at me. I clap my hands over my mouth. Mikey comes over.

"Are you okay?"

I nod and throw my arms around Mikey's waist.

"That is the best food I've ever tasted!" I grin up at him and he grins back.


	7. Coming out of her shell

Author notes- I do not own the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles or any of their compadres.

ChibiLover- -Gives special Mikey breakfast- There you go!

RubyFireGem- Glad to see you're still reading, you're not annoying me at all! -Gives special Mikey breakfast also-

Coming out of her shell.

It's been a few weeks since the boys rescued me from Stockman's lab and I feel right at home. I still can't really remember anything, but as Donny says, I guess it might be for the best.

My feelings seemed to have calmed down slightly now too. Mikey & Donny are the best big brothers I could ask for, Mikey is so much fun and Donny is so sweet. Raph and Leo on the other hand… I'm not quite sure. I have feelings for both of them, but I know I better pick soon. Raph and Leo don't get on so well as it is, I don't want to give them more reason to fight.

As I lie in my bed, thinking about all this, I get jumped on by my littlest big brother Mikey.

"Karmy! Karmy! Wake up! C'mon c'mon c'mon!" The delighted squeals fill the air as he jumps on my bed, and me, in my half asleep state. My eyes fly open and I give Mikey an evil grin, pushing him off the bed. I lie back down pulling the blankets over my head. "Karmy, it's important." Mikey's voice sounds slightly sad. I sigh and sit up, facing him.

"What is it Mikey?"

"Well…" He looks uneasy, "I forgot to remind you 'bout summin?"

"Hmm?"

"THE GAME!" He grins at me and scurries towards the door. I'm out of bed, pulling on a dress made for me by April and after my brother, cursing him. He jumps down the stairs and I follow, landing only just behind him. He squeals, slightly too high pitched for a male, and scurries towards Donny's lab. The purple banded brother stands at the door, trying to figure out what has happened.

"Nuh-uh Mikey, you make Karm mad, you get yourself out of it." He grins and shuts the door. Mikey makes a quick dash towards the sofa and I lunge at him, jumping into him and knocking him onto the sofa. I sit on his stomach, both of our chests heaving with the quick burst of energy.

"You… fool… you… damn… fool." I grit my teeth at him. He grins at me sheepishly. We look up to notice the presence of Leonardo in the room, raising an eye ridge at us both.

"How old are you two again? Five?"

"Yeah! And proud!" Mikey holds his hand up to high three me, but he only gets a sarcastic look.

"I am perfectly grown up Leo." I fold my arms, looking up at the blue banded brother.

"In yer dreams, Kar." I hear Raph's voice and glance up at the top of the stairs where he's stood, grinning. I grin up at him.

"And in your dreams, you're attractive." I wink at him as I get off Mikey. I catch Mikey and Leo exchanging looks in the corner of my eye and spin round to look at them. Mikey looks at me sheepishly and Leo just smiles and walks off towards one of the dummies, drawing his sword. I head off into the kitchen where I saw Raph head into only a few seconds ago.

I sit down at the table and yawn.

"You got up late." He glances at me whilst he rummages in the fridge.

"I was up awake late last night reading my book." I stretch my wrist, trying to make it feel normal. Don took the bandages off for it a few days ago, and I still can't get used to the feeling of not having a bulky left wrist.

"How's yer wrist feelin'?" Raph says opening a can of soda and sitting next to me.

"It's okay, just feels weird that it isn't bulky." I say as he takes a drink from his soda. He nods and swallows.

"That's good." He goes to take another swig, then stops. "Oh yeah, Kar?"

"Hmm?" I look up at his brown eyes.

"Can you not nick my favourite CDs?" He grins. I go to open my mouth, going to drop Mikey in it, because I know he's the one taking them to give them to me, then stop. I'll get away with it easier than Mikey.

"Yeah, sorry," I grin back at him, "you do have a good music taste though."

"Thanks, better than Mikey's anyway. I feel sorry for Donny havin' to live in the room next door and put up with him blastin' some heavy metal shit at one in the mornin'." He swigs at his drink.

"Hey, metal isn't bad, I like it." I pull a mock shocked face but he only rolls his eyes as he drinks.

"If ya say so. Anyway, why was it when I came downstairs this mornin' I saw ya lyin' in a very sexual position with my little bro?"

My cheeks flush, "Raph! It wasn't like that!"

"I know!" He laughs at me, "I just like embarassin' ya, it's too easy."

I roll my eyes at him.

"We were playing 'The Game' which is-"

"Another dumb ass Mikey game?"

"Er, no. Okay, the rules of 'The Game' is to forget about the game."

"What do you mean?" He frowns.

"You just need to forget about the fact you're playing 'The Game'."

"An' when Mikey squeals 'The Game' at ya, ya get ultimately pis-… uh, annoyed at him, because he's reminded ya?"

"Yup, that's pretty much it." I grin at the turtle scratching his head.

"Right." He takes another drink. We sit in silence for a while, both thinking about our own things, when I hear Leo's voice talking to somebody, very quietly.

"But haven't you noticed… I'm not sure how to say it… she's different?"

"I'm not sure she's different Leo," Don's voice comes into the equation, "I think she was just shy. It's like one of us going into a home full of girl turtles, with no memory of who we are… would you be relaxed?! Huh, I don't think so. She's probably just…" I hear Don laugh to himself slightly.

"Just what?"

"There's only one way I can think of saying it, and it's the most inappropriate way… Leo, I think, metaphorically speaking, Karm is, well, coming out of her shell."

I hear Leo laugh slightly too.

"I think I know what you mean."

I grin to myself and notice Raph watching me.

"What?" I look up at him.

"Ya heard that huh?"

"Yeah, coming outta my shell, ha ha, nice one Donny." I roll my eyes grinning.

"Either Donny and Leo were talkin' very loud or ya got good hearin'."

"You're all old, you all have to speak up to hear each other." I grin as Raph finishes his drink. He crushes the can in his hand and throws it in the bin.

"Sorry, what was that? I was too busy imaginin' that was your head." He grins back at me.

"You sure that's what you were imagining?"

Both of our eyes lock, him looking into my green and blue eyes whilst I look into his brown eyes.

"Raph!" Leo calls out interrupting us.

"What Leo?" Raph calls out back, breaking away from my eyes, though I still watch him with mine.

"Well, you know that noise, of the secret elevator humming? That wouldn't happen to be an unwanted guest would it?"

Raph groans to himself and gets up to head out of the kitchen when a voice rings out.

"Hey Raph! Where are you bone head? WHOA! Nice dig!"

I shudder as I recognise the voice of the second of the turtles human friends, Casey Jones.

Okay, Casey is nice, but he's gruff and he's loud and my experience of male humans isn't the best. The first time April came into the lair to visit the guys and me for the first time, I shut myself in my room for two days afterwards. I can't stand humans, even nice ones like April and Casey, my trust is way too broken with them. Unless they do something to show I can trust them, I won't. Okay, April made me some clothes, but that might be her being nice only to lull me into a false sense of security. Call me paranoid or whatever, but _I don't like humans_. That's what happens when one snaps your arm in two.

Raph glances behind at me and sees my uneasiness. He sighs and leaves the room, whilst I sit in the kitchen, holding myself, trying to convince myself Casey is not about to go and break my arm and that the boys wouldn't allow it anyway. I breathe in deeply, and follow Raph.

Casey is sat on the sofa, the TV remote in his hands, Mikey quivering near by whilst Leo and Don exchange looks. Raph turns to look at me also quivering in the door way and Donny notices it too. Donny comes over, and takes me back into the kitchen.

"C'mon Karm, I'll make you something to eat and a cup of coffee. Sorry I'm no Mikey, it'll just be toast."

I nod silently, still holding my arms and rubbing them with my hands.

"Hey Raph, got any beer? I could really go for some. An' where's ya chick?"

I sigh sadly at being called a 'chick'.

"No Casey, I've told ya, we don't have beer _an' she isn't my chick_." He hisses the last bit.

"Hey, why get huffy 'bout it huh?"

"Casey, uh, lemme s-show you my D-DVD collection." I hear Mikey stutter, almost regretting his words. I thank my little brother in my head for getting the conversation off me. Donny sighs to himself.

"So much for coming out of her shell when he's around." Don mutters softly but I say nothing about hearing his soft words.


	8. A girl ninja

Author notes- I do not own the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles or any of their compadres.

Thanks for all the reviews everyone!

A girl ninja.

A while later, I manage to confront my fear and sit in the same room as Casey. He sits on the sofa, whilst I sit by Don's lab. The guys stand around waiting to practise whilst Splinter is having with words with Raph quietly about Casey's appearance.

"Raphael, friend or not Mr Jones is an unwanted guest right now, you must practise."

"Sorry Master Splinter but I didn't even invite him! He just turned up."

"Unless you find out why he is here and get rid of him Raphael, you will be doing meditating from now until dinner!" Splinter's furry brow frowns and I laugh at the thought of Raphael sitting still and quiet for that long. A clearly peeved Splinter hears my laughter and he claps his eyes on me. "Karma, I take it you find Raphael's unfortunate situation funny, would you like to join in mediating with him?"

My smile fades, but Mikey grins.

"Sensei, could Karm be a ninja? A girl ninja?!"

"A _kunoichi_ Mikey." Leo corrects him.

"Now that would be cool." Raph grins.

"And hot!" Mikey's grin widens and my cheeks flush.

"Enough!" Splinter shushes his sons and thrashes his tail wildly. He leans on his walking stick, one paw on top of the other and closes his eyes. His tail stops thrashing and rests on the floor, the end of it flicking as he thinks.

"My sons, you do realise _kunoichi_ were trained very differently? They were trained in the art of disguise and seduction. Whilst Karma could use the disguise part of her training effectively, her seduction would be no use, as you are in fact the only male mutant turtles. This causes a big problem, as I would have to train her to be as stealthy as a _kunoichi_ but as strong as a _ninja_, it would be hard work. Besides, you seem to be making this decision for her."

"Sensei, she is smaller and lighter than us, her stealth would be better than ours naturally." Leo says.

"An' what if we were all out tryin' ta deal with scum like Stockman? We wouldn't be able ta take her with us in case she got hurt, but leavin' her behind leaves her at risk too." Raph joins in.

"Having one more on our side would help, Sensei." Donny gives his input.

"Instead of stayin' home, watchin' TV and bein' bored, she could be out kickin' ass!"

"Michelangelo, you do less of the latter and more of the foremost anyway." Splinter opens his eyes to give a sarcastic look to his youngest son. "I see all of your points, but you have yet to see mine, are you even sure Karma would want to train as a ninja? You have yet to even ask!"

Everybody's eyes turn to me expectantly. I frown and bite my lip.

"I wanna be able to break Stockman's legs if he comes near me again... where do I sign up?"

All of the boys grin at me, then turn to their father and sensei.

"Hmm... I will trust my instincts on this and say yes, I will allow you to be my first kunoichi Karma, but for now," Splinter lowers his voice, "until Mr Jones is gone, there will be no practise. Do not be relieved, if he is not gone by dinner, you will spend dinner practising and not eating." The old rat turns to go to his room and I look over at Mikey, a look of absolute horror on his face.

"You heard the rat, he needs to go!" He strides over to the sofa, his brothers following. Raph stops Mikey.

"I'll sort this." The second eldest brother goes over to his friend. "Hey Case!" He leans over Casey's shoulder, looking up at the football on the multiple TVs.

"What d'ya want Raph, ya interruptin' me dude!" Casey waves his hand in front of Raph's face as if to shoo him.

"Us interruptin' him?!" Leo snorts & Raph shoots him a look, then turns back to Casey.

"Well, my bros an' I were wonderin', why exactly did ya drop by huh? 'Cause yanno, ya name it, we'll do it for ya."

"Huh? Oh, I forgot." Casey shuffles, "Oh yeah that was it!" His attention finally breaks away from the TV whilst he rummages in his back jean pocket. He pulls something out and gives it to Raph who stands up straight and frowns. Leo looks over Raph's shoulder.

"Casey, where did you find this?" Leo says, passing it so Mikey, Don and I can look.

"More like 'where didn't you find it?' Leo, it's all over the place! Some others too, a lot more, uh, graphic."

I finally manage to see what they're on about as Don hands a photograph to me portraying purple graffiti depicting four turtles skewered on a sword. I bite my lip worriedly.

"What you guys gunna do?"

"Nothing." Leo shrugs, "They're obviously just trying to get at us Casey."

"Whoever 'they' are." Don shrugs too. "As Leo said, it's better to do nothing. It may be somethin just to rile us up and retaliate against them, it could be a trap."

"Raph?" Casey looks at his friend, "Surely yer a bit pissed 'bout it?"

Raph looks round at his brothers and huddles his shoulders, "Sorry Case, I'm with my bro's on this one."

"Oh c'mon! Don't ya wanna go kick some Purple Dragon scum's ass?!"

"Mr Jones, as the boys have said, we'd be stooping to their level and giving them a chance to strike for us." Splinter comes out from his room, probably wondering why there is talk of going topside and mindless violence.

"Fine!" Casey turns back round to the TV sighing and slumps onto the sofa. Splinter sighs as he realises Casey won't be leaving any time sooner. He takes a place outside his room, lights some candles and sits down. Don goes into his lab and Mikey picks up a handheld game console and slumps on the armchair. Leo takes out one of his katana and starts to swing with it lazily as he makes his way over to one of the practise dummies.

"Y'alright Karm?" Raph looks over at me biting my lip.

"Just worried." I meet his eyes.

"What 'bout?" He leans against the back of the sofa, coolly.

_'Jeez, why does he have to be all cool like that?'_ I think to myself.

"Just… Nothing." I walk off to watch Leo practise. I hear Raph sigh, slightly irritated. As I watch Leo's fluid movements from a safe distance, I hear a thud behind me, as Casey and Raph rough house each other.

"Raphael!" Splinter stands up, irritated by the noise and commotion. He then sighs, unsure what to do as his son looks up at him expectantly. "Take Mr Jones topside to burn some of that energy you two seem to have too much of."

"Alright topside!" Raph grins, pushing Casey sideways & rushing out. "Yer a bonehead Casey!"

"Oh I'm a bonehead am I Raph? Then what does that make you?…" Casey's voice trails off as he rushes after Raph. Leo breathes a sigh of relief and sheaths his sword.

"Have we got to train now Sensei?" Mikey asks sadly, looking up for a moment from his game. Splinter's eyes flicker with thought.

"I was planning to do a group practise but as Raphael is out with Mr Jones I think maybe starting to train Karma will benefit her and yourselves. Teaching another allows you to reflect on yourself. I think Karma should practise more on her stealth and speed rather than her strength and force, as she naturally has that more than you, my sons. But you know she should start by finding her balance and not diving head first into combat."

"I understand sensei." Leo bows and sits in front of me.

"Hang on a minute sensei, Karm may not be as beginner as we think. There is a lot she doesn't remember, she may have some training that has gone unknown to her and us." Don comes to the door of his lab.

"Hmm." Splinter pulls on the fur on his chin. "You may be right Donatello. Leonardo, stand, Michelangelo, Donatello, bound his right arm."

"What?" Leo frowns at his sensei.

"Leonardo, no matter how much training Karma may have had, I do not expect her to go up to such a trained warrior as yourself, well, at least not completely able." Splinters face breaks in a smile and Leo also smiles slightly as his brothers tie up his right arm.

"Okay, what's the betting Donny, that Karm will just jump on him?" Mikey says.

"I heard that Mikey!" I frown jokingly and grins. Mikey and Don go over by the sofa to watch. My heart thumps nervously at my chest. Leo bows and I do too.

"You will go easy on me won't you?" I ask.

"Of course I will little sister." Leo smiles and his eyes twinkle. He takes a step towards me and I take 3 back. He laughs and I blush. He takes a step forward and kicks at me, hardly using any strength or speed. I step to the side but he does it again and his kick comes into contact with my plastron, knocking me off balance slightly.

"Okay, we've gathered I suck, can we get on with my training?" I take my eyes off Leo to look at Splinter, a deadly mistake to make. Leo swings his foot underneath my feet, causing me to crash to the floor. Everybody laughs slightly and I frown at him playfully.

"Never mind Karm, we'll train you so you can do it to me one day." Leo holds out his hand. I smile at him and go to take his hand when I sweep my foot underneath his. He crashes onto his shell and I get up. He looks up and grins.

"Oh? You wanna fight dirty? Okay." He jumps up effortlessly and balls his hand into a fist. He punches out twice with his left hand and I duck both times. He tries to catch me out by kicking out and I grab his foot, pulling him over. He crashes to the floor again.

"C'mon Leo! You're gettin' your ass kicked by a girl!" Mikey shouts and Leo grimaces at him. He gets up once again and without hesitation strikes out with another punch. As I turn out of the way of his fist just skimming past my plastron, I double over, clutching my stomach. Leo gasps and comes over, a hand on my shell.

"Karm? Karm? Are you okay? I didn't mean-" I turn around giving him a playful punch to the cheek and grin. His face turns from concern to a grin. "Hey! You tricked me!"

Splinter chuckles, "Ninja are known for their trickery my son,_ kunoichi _especially."

"Okay, so you know how to dodge, we've gathered that. But I wanna see if you can actually punch Karm." He turns his left shoulder and arm to me. "Gimme a punch."

I hesitate, "I don't wanna hurt you."

"You won't, honestly."

"Not with those muscles." Mikey wolf whistles, then cries out as Don smacks him upside the back of his head. Leo rolls his eyes.

"Go on."

I bit my lip, and punch him half heartedly. He frowns.

"I know you can do better than that. Go on."

I sigh, draw back my fist and curl it in to a neat ball. My fist connects with Leo's muscley upper arm. He doesn't budge but he raises an eye ridge, clearly impressed.

"Not a bad punch." He turns to face me again and knocks against his plastron. "Gimme a kick."

I hesitate once again, but Leo looks at me as if to say, 'c'mon'. I bite my lip, and step back to give myself room. I deliver a kick to Leo's plastron, and as with the punch, he doesn't move, but looks impressed.

"Okay, I'd say you've had some training at least, even if it is only a little, you've got a strong punch and kick."

"But you didn't even budge!" I protest, but Leo's mouth only smiles.

"But you didn't even use all your strength." He unexpectedly lunges a punch my way, but for some reason I expect it. I dodge his fist, twisting to the side of it and grab his wrist. I curl myself against him, his fist clenched tight to my plastron, whilst my shell is pressed against his plastron. I look up at him and grin, using my foot to wrap around his ankle. As I let go of his fist, my foot pulls his ankle from it's place and Leo stumbles, but doesn't quite fall. His off balance costs him and I spin around to give him a kick to the plastron. He steps back, managing to regain his balance. He does a perfect flip backwards and I advance forwards. As he lands he kicks out at my plastron and it unbalances me. He sweeps out his foot again, hoping to completely unbalance me but I jump backwards, landing deftly and holding out my arms defensively in front of me. He stretches his wrist and lunges for me. I dodge to the side of him, and as he rushes past, I grab a katana from its sheath on Leo's back and hold it in front of me. Leo turns around, shock on his face as he finally realises he is one katana down. He draws his other and holds it in front of his face. Both of us look to Splinter, who does nothing to stop, only watches. Leo takes a breath and engages me in a fight with the blades. _Swipe, swipe, clash, swipe, dodge, clash, clash, roll, jump, swipe, swipe, clash, clatter. _Leo stands victorious, his katana held proudly in his hand, whilst mine lays not far away. He sheaths them both and I untie his arm.

"You're not bad."

"I could say the same thing back." I say cheekily. He smiles.

"So sensei? Is she gunna be a good _kun-oi-chi?_" Mikey asks.

"I think Karma will be an excellent _kunoichi ninja_ my son." Splinter smiles proudly.

The secret elevator hums and I frown.

"Please not Casey!" Mikey casts a glance upwards. As the doors open, Casey stumbles out, breathing heavily, anger contorted across his face. We all rush over, myself slightly more hesitantly than the rest.

"Casey, what's wrong?" Leo asks, holding him upright.

"Where's Raph?" I ask sullenly and Casey looks at me, the anger melting from him, and sadness replacing it.

"We found some Purple Dragon scum doing some more graffiti and we beat their asses but these other guys came out from no where, they were like, invisible ninja, and they knocked me unconscious and took Raph." He scuffs the floor with his shoe as he says the last bit. Donny frowns.

"Raph's cell, I'll see if I can track it."

"If you can't, I snagged this from one of those invisible bozos." Casey holds out an orange lens. Donny nods, takes it and goes off towards his lab. Leo, Mikey and Casey follow and I go to but Splinter holds me back.

"Come with me Karma."

I follow him into his room and he goes over to a wall, with countless Japanese swords hanging from it. He takes down a short sized pair of swords and hands them to me.

"_Wakizashi_, small swords, normally used with katana, but these are smaller and will make it easier for you to move with as you are my littlest ninja."

I bow and take the swords.

"Thank you."

"You may call me sensei, _musume_, you are part of our family now." He puts a hand on my shoulder and I smile. I sling the wakizashi over my shell, as Leo wears his katana. Splinter disappears into another room and comes out holding a dark green ninja mask. He hands it to me and I grin broadly. "You may accompany the boys on finding Raphael, I trust my instinct."

"What does your instinct tell you sensei?" I say putting on my mask.

"That you are able to protect yourself." He ties the tails for me and they hang down in my hair. He smiles and I smile back. I bow, and hurry out as I hear the boys leaving.

"Going somewhere? And without _moi?_" I step out of Splinter's room and they all look round. Mikey grins.

"Karm, you're such a hottie!"

"And Mikey, you're such a boy. C'mon, let's go save your brother."

"Coming with us Karm?" Leo asks as we go into the elevator.

"You bet!" I grin.


	9. Enter Baxter Stockman

Author's notes- I do not own any of the TMNT or their compadres.

Thank you Kyabetsu, ChibiLover, Zwinky and Ruby for all the reviews

Enter Baxter Stockman

As Leo drives the truck and Donny directs him, I look around it in awe.

"You ain't been outside in a few days have you Karm?" Mikey asks.

"Nope, and why the hell haven't I been in this thing before?! It is just TOO cool." I grin at my brother.

"Well, yanno, I'm kinda good at this stuff." Mikey leans back into the car seat coolly, when a jolt unsettles him. I laugh at him and he grins sheepishly.

"Almost there, just left here and… park." Donny says bemused. We come to a halt and pile out the back.

"We're at the docks?" I frown.

"Then where's Raph?" Casey asks. Donny and Leo come around the back of the truck.

"Well, you see that huge ship with that red symbol on? He's on there." Don says matter-of-factly, putting his bag over his shoulder.

"Oh." Casey says.

"Good job we can swim eh?" Mikey pats me on the shell and wanders over to the docks.

"What about Casey?" I ask.

"You can swim can't you Case?" Mikey asks.

"Yeah!"

"Then we're fine." Donny and Casey follow Mikey. Leo looks at me.

"Are you okay?" He asks softly.

"Yeah." I look up at him.

"You don't have to come, this is more dangerous than we thought Karm."

"I want to. I want to…" '…rescue Raph.' My mind says. "…help you guys." My mouth says. Leo smiles.

"I'll protect you." He takes my shoulder and leads me to the water's edge. I jump into the icy, murky water and Leo follows. Mikey, Donny and Casey are already swimming ahead. I shudder and start swimming alongside Leo. I glance up at the night sky, not a cloud in sight. Twinkling stars are sprinkled across the deep navy sky like glitter, and the moon hangs between the glitter, giving off a beauty of its own.

'It would be such a lovely night, if I wasn't swimming in icy water trying to rescue one of my family who may or may not be on a boat crammed with… jeez, only knows.'

We climb aboard the ship, hiding behind some crates to organise ourselves.

"Okay, Don, Mikey, Casey, take the lower levels and work up searching the rooms, Karm and I will take the upper level and work down. Call if you find Raph." Leo takes charge.

"You might need these." Donny pulls out two pairs of goggles from his bag. "Heat sensitive goggles, to help you see any of these apparently 'invisible ninja' Casey saw."

"Thanks." Leo hands me a pair. We head our separate ways.

Leo abd I enter one of the upper hallways, with doors scattered down it. We search through three rooms without any trace of anything useful and sneak past the door of another. We peek in the window in the door to see three ninja sitting around. Leo frowns.

"Ninja coffee break." I whisper and shrug. Leo smiles and carries on down the hallway. We come to two doors beside each other. We peek in the first one and I see Stockman. His back is to the door, but I know it's him. I close my eyes and my head is bombarded with him.

'_You're perfect.' 'You're scum.' 'You'll wish I'd killed you.' 'You're my pride and joy.' 'Karma, oh Karma…'_

"Karm." Leo's voice brings me back to reality.

"I'm okay." I lie. My heart pounds at my chest, my blood feels like ice, my head twirls and my lungs burn. "But it's… it's him. It's Stockman." I whisper. Leo nods sullenly. He creeps along the corridor, to peek in the room next door and I follow.

"Raph."

"Strapped to an operating table?" I frown then reach for the door handle. Leo grabs my hand and shakes his head.

"Two way mirror," he points out the mirror in the room Raph's in, "There was a mirror in Stockman's room. Keeping an eye on him I guess." Leo looks away absent-mindedly, thinking about what to do next. I take matters into my own hands. I pull off my mask and put the wakizashi down on the floor. I go to open Stockman's door but Leo grabs my leg.

"What are you doing?!" He hisses.

"If I go in, he'll be too pre-occupied to wonder how the hell I'm here and why to notice you sneaking in and busting out Raph."

"How are you gunna escape?"

"He's one man, I can take him on, I've been wanting my revenge... heh, my karma." I look darkly at Leo. Before he can give any objections, I open the door. I hear Leo inhale quickly, then pay attention to the man in front of me.

"Don't you know how to knock?!" He says indignantly, spinning around on his chair to see the intruder. "126? Karma? You're back?! Where from? What are you doing here? What-" He screws his face up in confusion.

I walk over to Stockman and stand in front of him so his back is to the secret window.

"I don't even half know. I was wandering the streets for so long, hiding in an abandoned warehouse down here by the docks. I saw the ship and recognised the symbol, I think… I don't know, my head is blurry." I lean against the wall, holding my head.

"My precious experiment, I am glad you are back." He gets up, and uses his hand to lift up my chin to look at me. I freeze at his touch, terror and rage fighting against each other in the whole of my body. I use my breath to stop my self from shaking and screaming. He picks up the tag hanging around my neck to look at it and smiles to himself. "We can get back to your training, can't we?"

"My training?"

"Yes, your ninjitsu training, you're going to be a kunoichi, the most deadly kunoichi. Do you not remember?" He cocks his head to look at my face.

"No." I scrunch my face up.

"Well, you were being trained, to be a killing machine." Stockman says it all too calmly. "And if you do these killings, I-we will get rewarded, a lot." He smiles evilly. "I'm sure you would be able to jog your memory if you read your diary Karma."

"Diary?" I look up at him and frown.

"Why yes, you had a diary, it was in the lab. How did you get out of the lab by the way?"

"I just-I ran, I just ran from the destruction."

"You managed to remember to pick up your necklace on your way out and not your diary? How strange." He muses. My eyes wander to the mirror on the opposite side of the room. Empty.

'Good, now I just need to-'.

The door bursts open, Leo is flung to the floor, then Raph. A huge man steps through the door, cracking his knuckles. I look up at him, a tattoo of a purple dragon curls around his left arm, and the same symbol from the boat tattooed on his right arm. Scratches don the left side of his face & neck.

"I found these freaks tryin' to escape. If you don't want nothin' else with 'em, I'm gunna kill 'em in the worst way possible." He grinds his right fist into his left palm.

"No, why don't we give this experiment a test run?" Stockman pushes me forward. "Go on, hand out the karma to these freaks."

"Is that why I'm called Karma?" I spin around to look at him.

"Yes yes, now kill them already." Stockman says in a bored tone.

The huge man draws Leo's katana from his back and throws them to me. I hold them hesitantly and walk over to Leo, who looks up at me with brown eyes.

"I'm sorry." I look into his eyes and say. He looks down at the floor.

I raise the katana and throw them down, aiming for the big mans foot. He moves it at the last minute, dodging it.

"What? What are you doing?!"

"Not listening to you anymore Stockman," my heart pounds at my chest, "I'm not your puppet!" I hiss.

"Fine Hun, do with them as you wish." Stockman turns his back. I get picked up and restrained by the huge man, I'm guessing he's Hun, as well as Raph. Leo is picking up his katana and just as he reaches them, Hun puts a heavy foot on Leo's shell. "But wait…" Stockman picks something up from his desk. "I wonder what this video tape contains?" He turns back to me. "You sent these two to search my lab, yet you know nothing of the diary they found."

"What?" I ask, puzzled

"You're clearly suffering from amnesia, there is no way my experiment would talk like that to me. But they found a diary, your diary. A diary that could fill all the missing gaps in your life. I guess they never gave it you did they? Left you to suffer in silence…" He sighs.

"Liar!"

"I lie? Let's see what the tape says, shall we?" He turns to a TV, and puts in the tape. It shows Raph and Leo clambering through the debris of the lab. Leo picks up something shiny and small, then something else bigger.

Stockman then turns his back on us. Hun takes his foot off Leo's shell.

"Try any funny business, and I'll squeeze the guts out of these two. MOVE!" He shouts at Leo and kicks him in the shell. Leo glares and Hun herds him into the room next to Stockman's and throws me and Raph to the floor. He grins evilly and shuts the door. I hear the click of the lock and sigh. I sense Raph move next to me.

"So what the hell else have you been hiding from me?!" I turn on the two brothers. Raph avoids my eyes but Leo looks over at me. "Raph… Leo…" My heart pounds against my chest.

"We found your diary Karm… we didn't wanna give it you, we didn't want you to be haunted by such memories. The lab you were in… it was horrible…"

"You kept it from me? You kept my past, who I am, away from me? You knew for weeks now that I'd struggled with who I am, but you kept it away?!"

"We though it would be best for you Karm…" Leo pleads.

"Best for me?… You thought… it'd be **best**?!"

"I'm sorry Karm." Leo comes over to me.

"**Stay away from me!**" I roar. "I guess you've read that thing, known what I am, known I was created only to kill you. You've been biding your time, trying to be all nice and sympathetic, when after all of this, you were gunna go and sell me to some bloody circus or stab me whilst I slept or something! I was created to bloody kill you, why do what's best for me?!" I run out of breath. Silent moments pass until Leo asks one thing.

"You wouldn't kill us though… would you Karm?"

I just turn my back on him.


	10. One of us

Author's notes- I do not own any of the TMNT or their compadres.

I was tempted to leave it a few days to post this to keep you all in suspense, but I thought I'd be nice seeing as I'd wrote it already. Enjoy!

One of us.

Not long after, Hun comes back into the room, cracking his knuckles.

"Well, well, had a little fallin' out have we?" Hun steps towards me huddled in the corner of the room. He picks me up and slams me against the wall. "Still don't know who you are?" He looks into my eyes, "I'll tell you, you're a stupid, pathetic, little mutant, who doesn't fit in anywhere, not even with these freaks." He says the last bit slowly as he's twisting a knife into me. I try not to let the terror building up inside of me spill out. I keep my expression stony and keep eye contact with him.

"Leave her alone you big gorilla." I hear Raph say quietly. Hun looks behind at him and grins. He slams my shell against the wall and lets go of me. I slide down the wall, and crumple into a ball. I try to crawl into the wall, anything to get away from this huge human trying to hurt me.

"Ha, what was that freak?" Hun steps towards Raph, who's standing glaring at him, his hands clenched into fists.

"I said, 'leave her alone you big gorilla'."

"So, you're stickin' up for this? This pathetic ball of nothing hidin' in the corner like a coward? Huh?" Hun looks down at me and back at Raph.

"Yeah, I'm stickin' up for her… She's not pathetic. There's one pathetic, coward in this room, and that's you, tryin' ta threaten a girl who's terrified of humans enough as it is. You're scum."

I look up at Raph as he says it. His eyes are fixed on the man in front of him. If looks could kill, Hun would be stone dead by now.

"I'm scum?" Hun snorts. "You're protectin' the thing created to kill you, I might be scum, but you're just damned stupid. She doesn't fit in, even with you freaks… she's one of us." Hun's last words make my whole body shudder in disgust.

"She will never be one of you, ever! She is a good person, you damn scum bags are just tryin' ta turn her into somethin' she's just not!" Raph shouts. "You'll all pay." He snarls and Hun laughs.

"This will be fun." He steps towards Raph. I close my eyes, I don't want to see them fight. I feel a soft touch on my shoulder and I flinch away and open my eyes. Leo's staring back at me, concern spread across his face.

"Karm, look, we need to get out of here, and you're coming with us. You need to help us. Raph and I are gunna have to fight, and we can't if one of us has to carry you. I know you must be terrified, I feel stupid now, a whole ship of humans, I should have left you in the truck, but now isn't the time for me to start saying how stupid I am, can you stand?"

I nod and I carefully stand. Leo holds me tight for a few seconds and looks over to his brother, struggling to fight off Hun. He takes my wakizashi from his belt and hands them back to me.

"I'll help Raph, you try to pick the lock okay?"

I nod again as Leo rushes off to help Raph. I rush over to the door and peek into the keyhole. I bite my lip, figuring out what to pick it with. I run my hands through my hair and feel one of my hair clips. I pull it out and start to move it in the lock. I hear crashes behind me but ignore them, concentrating fully on getting the door unlocked. I hear a click and smile, satisfied. I put my hair clip back and open the door. I look behind at Leo and Raph, standing over an unconscious Hun, both of their chests heaving.

"I got it open." I stand in the doorway.

They turn around and Leo grins.

"I knew we could count on our kunoichi."

I blush slightly and we all rush out of the room. As we make our way down and out of the hallway, Leo calls Don.

"Don, we got Raph, but we're on the run now, Stockman had us captured for a while… Top deck, okay."

As we reach the open door at the end of the hallway, it gets kicked closed.

"Oh shit." Raph starts backing up. I look at him puzzled, and then my feet are swept from underneath me. I crash to the floor and Leo gets a punch to the cheek.

"Invisible ninja?" I look up at Raph and he frowns, but nods.

"Call 'em whatever, they're just such-" Raph gets cut off by a kick to the stomach. I grab my goggles and put them on, to see an orange and red blur looming above me. I kick out with my left foot, and it connects with the stomach of the attacker. He groans and I get up, punching him in the jaw. He stumbles backwards and I trip him up.

"Leo, use your goggles!" I turn to another orange and red blur sneaking behind me and take him out.

"Their cloaking devices are on their chest, try to slash them if you can." Leo says standing before a flickering ninja, katana drawn.

"Well, yanno Leo, bein' able ta see 'em might help me a bit here!" Raph backs up against a wall, lunging wildly with his sai. I slash across the chest of one and kick him Raph's way.

"Thanks Kar, I been wantin' ta get my hands on one o' these!" Raph hits the stunned ninja with the end of his sai, causing him to drop to the ground, out cold.

"C'mon, before any more come." Leo opens the door and rushes out onto the deck. He glances around, and spots Don, Mikey and Casey waiting around casually.

"Hey guys, what took you?" Mikey grins. I see a grimace fall across Leo's face.

"Mikey, I've missed ya bro…" Raph goes over to his youngest brother, "…missed kickin' the hell out of ya." He grins evilly and Mikey grins sheepishly.

"What's this? A family reunion, how lovely." Stockman's condescending voice speaks out. I back up to in between Leo and Don, surrounded by the comfort and safety of my family. Immediately, Raph's eyes widen and his whole body starts to tremble with rage.

"You… You're the scumbag that broke Karm's arm." He says relatively calmly.

"Did I?" Stockman pauses, casting his eyes to the sky as if it were such an insignificant memory to him, that he needed to think about it. "Oh yes, she was being so insolent, a shame really… the metal pipe coming into contact with her bone was very satisfying though…" He smiles evilly and Raph loses it.

"**I am gunna make you wish you were dead!**"

"Why? Do you care about her?"

Raph stops, his anger cooling somewhat.

"Oh, how sweet? This angry, freak has a soft spot, _how sweet!_" Stockman almost laughs. "A soft spot for a pathetic, little… assassin." He plays off the reactions on my family's faces. "Oh yes, some of you don't know, that Karma was an experiment, a creation for your demise. Ha, and I bet you let her right into your home!"

I squirm at the horrid mind games he's playing.

"You… are… dead." Raph draws his sai and rushes for Stockman, but the scientist stands undaunted. Eight invisible ninja appear right in front of him and Raph makes a speedy halt.

"My Foot tech ninja, do you like? I made them myself."

I hear the clatter of weapons, as Mikey, Donny and Casey draw them.

"Karm, just stay back here with me okay?" Donny stands protectively in front of me. As the boys rush towards the ninja, I go to join them and get dragged back. I scream out as an invisible hand claps over my mouth. I instinctively bite out and hear a yelp as the grip is loosened. I kick out behind me and my leg gets grabbed. I get pulled to the floor, my shell landing with a crash against the metal. The pain shudders through my back and I'm pinned down, cold metal held against my throat. I feel my feet being pulled together and then my hands. I try to wriggle and then I realise I've been bound. My attackers uncloak themselves and drag me to my feet, a tanto held to my throat. I look around to see my family triumphant against the Foot tech ninja. Mikey is the first to notice where I am.

"Karm!" He gasps and everybody turns around.

"Let go of her Stockman!" Leo turns to the evil man.

"Hmm. No." He says simply. "She is mine, I'm giving you a break here! You can go, but she is staying. She will be the one to kill you, and it will be brilliant. She will be my assassin, whether you, or she, likes it or not!" He laughs evilly. Raph lunges for Stockman, he tackles him to the ground, holding a sai to his throat.

"Let her go, or I will kill you, in the slowest, most painful way possible. Every pain you have ever caused her, I will cause you. Every bruise, every broken bone, every cut you have given her, I will give you three times over. Let her go." Raph's voice is terrifying, calm but threatening at the same time.

"W-want her, go and g-get her." Stockman stutters and lifts a hand into the air, signalling something to the ninja.

I'm lifted into the air, then flying through it, overboard the boat. My body hurtles through the icy water, going further down and down. Panic flows through my body, and rises into my throat. I try to scream, but no noise comes out, only water gushes in. I hold onto the little breath I have and yank at the bounds on my wrists. It burns against my skin, but I do it again and again. _'I wish I could be as calm as the blue surrounding me, I might be able to do something if I was calmer…' _I close my eyes and feel myself being yanked upwards. I open my eyes and see one of my brothers pulling me up towards the surface, and the water breaking at the surface where four other figures jump in. My lungs start to burn but I hold on, finally breaking at the surface after what seems like hours. I gasp, relieved by the feeling of air in my lungs. I finally register my rescuer, still holding me.

"Raph…" I splutter.

"Ssh, just breathe." He searches in his belt for a sai. Leo swims over and holds me. Raph dives down to cut the bounds on my ankles, re-emerging a few seconds later, to cut the bounds on my wrist. "Don't worry, I didn't see up yer dress." He tries to lighten the situation, and he grins slightly whilst pulling the rope from my wrist. I let Leo let go of me, and kick my legs beneath me to keep myself afloat.

"We'll have to swim underwater, not let them know where we've gone if they try to come after us." Leo glances up at the ship and dives under the water. Casey, Mikey and Don follow, leaving me and Raph, looking at each other.

"It'd be a nice night if we weren't in freezin' water, swimmin' for our lives eh?" He smiles.

'Raphael actually has a _smile_?!' My mind almost explodes

The grin on my face takes him aback, his smile disappearing, replaced by a paranoid frown. "What?"

"I didn't know you had a smile." I grin wider as his cheeks flush slightly. He puts his sai in his belt, takes a deep breath and dives underneath the water. He swims below me, giving a tug on my foot. I grin and follow him. As we come up to the docks, Leo helps out Raph and Donny helps out me. I sigh at my see-through dress, flattened against my figure and wait for a comment from Mikey.

"I think you should wear that more often Karm." He grins, climbing into the back of the truck. I ring out the bottom of it and roll my eyes. We all get into the truck and Leo starts it up to drive us home.

I sit in the back, still slightly shaken by my unexpected trip into the water, and rub at my sore wrists.

"Are you okay?" Raph asks me, coming over from looking over Leo's shoulder to sit next to me. He grabs his seatbelt & pulls it around him.

"For somebody who almost drowned, yeah." I say sarcastically.

"Yeah, stupid question I guess." He rubs the back of his neck. I look down sullenly.

"Why did you save me?" I ask quietly.

"What d'ya mean?"

"Raph." I look up at him. "You know what I am, why didn't you just go whilst you could, without me?"

"The same reason ya turned around and told Stockman where ta shove it."

I look at him puzzled. "He is the only person who has ever told ya what ta do, the only person you've prob'ly only listened ta. He told ya ta kill us, and ya didn't. Ya were given a choice Karma, yer choice was ta let us live or not. Stockman told ya ta do it, yeah, but ya didn't hafta listen ta him. Ya didn't have ta save us either, but ya did."

"You didn't have to save me from his lab. I had a reason to save you and Leo, you're not scum, you're good guys, and there ain't many of those around."

"I chose ta save ya, like ya chose ta save us. No matter what Stockman thinks, he can't make ya somebody ya don't want ta be. We all have free will, nobody can make us do somethin' we don't wanna do. Besides, what Hun said wasn't true, you're not one o' them, you're one o' us, a 'good guy'. Well, not a guy, obviously, 'cause I saw up your dress when I swam under ya." He grins.

"Hey!"

"Ha ha, sorry. But, you're one o' us Karm, I think ya should remember that. You're a great person, don't let anybody ever tell ya differently."

I look down into my lap and stay silent for the rest of the journey home.


	11. Choices

Author's notes- I do not own any of the TMNT or their compadres.

I should be coming to the end of this fic but I have way too many ideas with Karma that I'll probably do a saga for her. There'll still be unanswered questions at the end of this one too, so, watch this space!

Choices.

As we get back into the lair, Mikey heads straight for the sofa, grabbing the remote. I smile at my littlest big brother, wishing I could forget my troubles as easily as he can. I look back to my bigger brothers, Donny's frowning, and muttering something to himself. He catches my gaze and smiles, making his way into his lab. Leo's face is clearly plastered with worries and troubles on his mind and Raph's had the same far away look since talking with me on the truck. Leo lets himself relax for a change, taking a place next to Mikey on the sofa. Raph doesn't say anything and goes up to his room. I stand in the middle of the lair, in my damp dress, my wet hair sticking to my face. I pick out the soggy tails of my mask out of my hair and sigh.

"I'm gunna go in the bath." I say to anyone listening. Leo looks back at me and nods. I make my way up the stairs and into the bathroom to start running my bath, then go into my room to get some clean pyjamas. As I go back into the bedroom, I lock the door and slide down against it, crumpling on the floor. I sob quietly, hoping the running water will drown out my noise. Breathing out shakily, I glance over at the bath, almost full. I go over, dipping my hand into the water to check the temperature. I turn off the taps and rub my eyes. Sighing, I untie my mask then take off my weapons and dress. I put them in a pile, laying my wakizashi down carefully. I clamber into the steaming bath carefully, lowing myself down. I close my puffy eyes and try to relax but I can't and sit up again, washing my face, then the rest of me. I lay back and I dip my head below the water, wetting my hair, and begin to wash it.

'_What do I do? The guys… do they even think the same of me? Jeez, I bet Raph and Leo are dead put off me now. Why would they let me in their home still? They should know I'd never do what Stockman asks of me… but why should they trust me? They hardly know me! I would never hurt any of them, I love them all too much already. Lovely, sweet Donny, always making me coffee in the morning… and cheeky Mikey who makes the best breakfasts ever… Leo, my biggest, most inspirational brother… and Raph… the hothead, the one who almost killed Stockman, and for who? For me?… No. No, heh, who am I kidding? He probably just hates his guts for destroying their home before. He wouldn't do that for me… would he?… No. He wouldn't. End of. I'm gunna just stay a few days, try to figure out where to go, and then get out of their way. I'll be okay. I mean, the guys did okay for themselves, look where they live! They don't need me anyway…'_

I shudder as I pour cool water over my head to wash out the rest of the shampoo. I sigh and heave myself out of the bath, wrapping myself up in a towel. As the water drains away, there's a polite knock at the door.

"Yeah?"

"Oh sorry Karm, I thought you were out, I'll wait, I only wanted to get ready for bed."

I open the door to a slightly shocked Leonardo. His eyes scan my body quickly, and once he realises I'm wrapped up in a towel, he relaxes.

"You can come in, I'm only combing my hair." I go over to the comb on one of the shelves, and start to comb through my wet, tangled hair. Leo comes in, slightly shyly, and makes his way over to the mirror. He takes off his mask and rubs his eyes. He starts to run some water in the sink, and looks up at me in the mirror.

"There's something of yours in my room, it's in the drawer by my bedside table, just go get it out, I think you know what it is." His eyes look bare without his mask. I nod and smile weakly.

"Thanks." I collect up my stuff and make my way into my room. I drop my wet dress and mask then put my wakizashi on the end of my bed. Frowning in the mirror at my hair, I start to dry it with a towel. I get dressed into my pyjamas and Leo's words still hang over me. _'There's something of yours in my room…'_. I decide to get it now, save disturbing Leo later. I walk past Mikey's empty bedroom, then past Donny's also empty bedroom. Raph's door is shut, and I can hear music playing quietly. I go into Leo's room and walk nervously towards his bedside table. I open it up, and a tattered black book lays inside of it, peering out at me. I almost fear it, and I pick it up quickly, as if it might jump out and hurt me if I don't.

'_C'mon Karm, it's a book! It's not gunna hurt you, just get out of Leo's room and go back to yours and lock yourself away for a while.'_

I pad carefully past everybody's rooms again, bumping into Leo on the way. He notices the book in my hands and puts a hand on my shoulder. I melt at his touch and fall into his arms. He hugs me back as I bury my head into his chest.

"What do I do with it Leo? It holds things about me, things I wanna know, things I'm not sure I wanna know. I don't know what to do."

"Imouto, you have three choices before you." Leo lifts up my chin so I look up into his eyes. "You can read it, you can put it away, forever or you can just get rid of it. Only you can make that choice Karm, but whatever choice you make, we'll help you through it, okay?"

"Thank you." I bury my head back into his chest and he strokes my hair.

"Go get some sleep now, you've had an eventful day."

I break away from him and nod.

"Night Leo."

"Goodnight, my little sister." He says, walking past me.

"Leo?" I ask, turning around. He turns back, giving a quizzical look. "Thanks again." I lift up the book in my hand and he smiles then carries on walking down to his room. I go back to mine, locking myself away for the night. I put the book on my desk, pick up my wakizashi, and put them next to it. I turn off the light, and get into my bed. I lay looking at the ceiling, until my eyelids fall heavily and I'm engulfed by darkness & dreams.


	12. Dreams

Author's notes- I do not own any of the TMNT or their compadres.

Dreams.

"Karma… Karma?" The voice drifts into my head and I start to wake up. I shiver at the cold surrounding me and I open my eyes. I look around at a white room, hardly registering it. The lumpy bed sticks into my side and I frown. As I sit up my necklace jingles as it moves . I finally register the room, cold, tiny and harsh on the eyes. A grey, metal door with a small, tinted window directly opposite my bed. I notice my clothes, a white dress, nothing like the clothes from April.

'_Where is my room? Where are my wakizashi? Where are my friends?! Oh no…'_ My breathing quickens and I look down at my wrist, bulky with bandages. _'Was I dreaming? Was there no Leo or no Raph? No Donny? No Mikey? No Splinter? No comfort, no safety? No. This can't be real. It's just a dream Karm, it's just a dream…'_ My breath quickens and the voice speaks out again, _his_ voice.

"Good morning my precious experiment."

My heart beats with such force, I'm scared it might break my ribs, my lungs sting and burn with the lack of oxygen as I struggle to keep a regular breathing rhythm, and my whole body shakes with shear terror. The terror of being alone with him.

The door opens, and Baxter Stockman steps in, grinning evilly. He holds a glass of water and two pieces of bread. He throws the bread on the floor and puts the water on the floor, without a care. It sloshes out of the top, dripping down the glass, wetting the white tiled floor. I look up at him in horror, and sit on my bed, bunching my legs up to my heaving chest.

"What's wrong Karma? Are you scared?" He says in his condescending voice, "Remember last night, I gave you your name? I said you were going to be useful from now on, not some wasted space failed experiment."

"Go away." I say feebly, and close my eyes, hoping it might make him go away.

"You will NOT speak to me like that!" He raises his voice. "And you will CERTAINLY not speak to Mr. Saki like that." I open my eyes, confused at what he means.

"Mr. Saki?"

Stockman says nothing, only turns to the door, where a Japanese man steps in. He smiles at me cruelly, like his mind ticks with all sorts of horrible things he wants to do to me.

"She is _perfect_ for the job." He turns to Stockman.

"What job? Who are you and what do you want from me?" I ask panicked. _'Another human, oh shit, shit, shit!'_ My mind races and Stockman turns to me, glowering.

"I warned you not to be insolent." He raises a hand to me, but the Japanese man stops him.

"Stockman! Stop it, she will not co-operate with you threatening her." The mans eyes wander to my wrist. "Even though it already looks as though you have done such a thing." I look up, petrified of this new man. He's too calm and too harsh, I just want to be asleep again.

"I am Oroku Saki, and I am the head of a very important… organisation and a great master of ninjitsu. Dr Stockman and I are business partners. I have been trying to make my ninja faster, stronger, better and Dr Stockman thought he had ideas about how to do that. We came to a hitch in our plan, no human would be willing to let us test on them. As he showed me around his lab, something had caught my eye, you. I asked if he would be willing to test on you, and he agreed. Over the years, we've tested new ways to improve strength and speed, and those tests have been run on you. You are a very powerful being now, though you do not look much. You were no longer much used to us on the other hand, we had talked about terminating your unfortunate life, a miserable freak taking up space. Heh, it seems fate has much in store for you yet little one. Yesterday my ninja came into contact with other mutations, like you. We thought it'd be, fun, to pit you against each other. I heard they were very skilled warriors. Either way, either they die, or you do, do you understand?" His cold eyes stare right into mine.

"Answer Mr. Saki, Karma." Stockman scowls at me.

"Oh yes, your name, very ingenious. You're to dish out the karma to these freaks. If you survive, you'll be our secret weapon, killing any foe that dares to stand in my way." He smiles evilly and I shudder. "And you will kill whoever I ask you to, otherwise you die instead." He says the last bit slowly and I close my eyes.

"No! No I won't, I will not kill my family! No!" I feel a grip on my shoulder and gasp.


	13. The diary

Authors notes- I do not own the TMNT or any of their compadres.

The diary.

I jolt in my bed and my eyes fly open. I sit up. Perched on my bedside and staring back at me, concern dominating his features, is Raph.

"Raph!" I collapse into the strongest turtle's arms. He holds me tight, stroking my hair as I weep into his shoulder.

"S'okay Karm, it was only a bad dream, you're okay."

"What was only a dream? Please say this isn't a dream, Raphy please, don't let me go." I choke out and hold him tighter.

"Kar, this ain't a dream, it's okay. It's you an' me, Karma an' Raph, an' you're okay."

I cry harder, scared to death that I'll wake up and be in Stockman's lab. Raph sighs and seems agitated, he lifts me out of my bed and puts me on his lap. I rest against his plastron, his strong arms wrapped around me. He lets me cry myself out of tears before asking me anything.

"Were ya dreamin' Karm?"

I nod, my breath still shaky.

"Was it 'bout Stockman?"

I nod again.

"And another man… I dunno… I dunno who he was… he told… me to… kill whoever he asked… me to…" I breathe out shakily. "I think he meant you, but Raphy I'd never kill you or Leo, or Mikey or Donny, I couldn't-" I rush my words but Raph only shushes me.

"Calm down Kar, don't work yourself up." He strokes my hair. I sigh into his chest. We sit in silence for a while when I wriggle out of Raph's grip. He tries to tug me back by my pyjama shorts, but I bat him off.

"What are ya doin'?" I take the black book from my desk and look at it, biting my lip. "I wanted to give it ya, Leo didn't want ta. Fearless thought he was doin' the right thing." Raph snorts.

"I… I want to read it." I turn around to face Raph. His face is completely solemn.

"Are ya sure?"

"Yeah."

"I'll leave ya ta read it by yourself, but if ya need me, I'll be right outside, okay?" He gets up, subconsciously touching his sai to make sure he has them. I nod and he leaves. The springs creak as I sit on the bed, book in my hands. I take a deep breath and flick to a random page.

'_Thursday 21st June,_

_Another day, another test. My arm aches like hell from whatever Stockman injected me with this time. I just wish sometimes he would find something lethal, but so far, it seems mutant turtles don't react to much. Unfortunately. I can hardly read what I'm writing here, I hate having to hide this thing and write in the dark. In fact, I hate all of this. Why can't he put me out of my misery? One day he's praising me, the next he's hitting me, I don't understand. I don't think I'll ever understand humans.'_

My lust for death in the entry makes me feel ashamed and confused_. 'Were things really so bad?' _I frown, turning to another random page and read on.

'_Friday 7th September_

_I swear if I hadn't stolen this thing from Stockman's desk to write my thoughts in, my mind would have exploded by now. I have too much running through my mind to even attempt to make sense of it in my head, so this is for the best. If he ever read it… I dread to think.'_

'_Okay, a slightly more optimistic entry I guess. I wonder though…' _Isearch through the pages, looking for the last entry, but another catches my eye.

'_I am so scared. I'm not even sure why I'm daring to write this in here. Stockman's hit me before, and pretty badly, but this time it was too far. I need to get out of here, but I have no hope in damn hell. My only hope is for somebody to save me, but who'd wanna save a freak like me? _

_I saw a woman in Stockman's lab yesterday. She had dazzling red hair and she was so beautiful. I envied her so much. Free to walk and be admired. If I ever walked free, it wouldn't be for long. I'd be captured, tortured, emotionally or physically. Even her name was beautiful, I heard Stockman say it, 'April'…'_

I freeze and my mind races_, 'April? It can't be!'_. I read on frantically searching for answers.

'…_he talked to her as if she were an angel. So unlike his opinion of me. I am pathetic and weak and unwanted. That's not even what I think Stockman thinks, I know he thinks that, he says it to me most days. Oh shit, I'm smudging the damn pages with my tears. I'm so pathetic I can't stop crying. I haven't stopped crying since that first half sob, half scream earlier from when that S.O.B broke my damn wrist. Well, I wasn't crying when I passed out from the excruciating pain, but waking up 5 minutes later, seeing my deformed, swollen arm, I couldn't stop bawling. He'd left me. Just crumpled on the floor, passed out. I had to splint it up myself. And when he came back, he just yelled at me for making a mess, and locked me back up in my room like the animal I am. I don't want to have to do this anymore_.'

I put my head in my hands and weep. _'I really am an animal. I summed myself up, right there and then. I can't take this.' _ I get up, the book tumbling to the floor from my lap. Flinging open the door, I notice the slumped figure just outside my door. He takes one look at my tear stained faced and gets up. I don't give him a chance to ask anything, and run. I just run. Down the stairs, out the door into the sewers.

The cold water splashes up my legs and tears roll down my cheeks, but I just keep going. The tears smudge my eyesight but my hearing doesn't fail me, Raph's splashing right behind me. Running blindly, taking whatever turn I feel like and throwing caution to the wind, Raph following all the way. I take a right and then a left, the tunnel stretching ahead. It's a lot wider and taller than the rest and extremely dark. I make out rubble at the end of the tunnel, piled high.

Stitch starts to take over my lower abdomen and I have little choice in slowing my pace and hope that the red banded ninja on my tail has to also.

Climbing up the rubble pile, I find a spot near the top to squeeze through. I hear the ripping of my pyjamas as they catch on the rugged bricks and realise Raph won't be able to squeeze through the gap. I slide down the rubble and notice that the tunnel exit has a metal frame around it, it must have had a door on it at some point. I turn to look at the rest of the room and gasp. It's a skeleton of the former laboratory, with all of the hi-tech equipment destroyed and corpses of Mouser robots scattered across what floor can be seen. Even in the darkness, even in the disarray, without a doubt I recognise this place, Stockman's lab.


	14. Back home

Authors notes- I do not own the TMNT or any of their compadres.

Only this chapter and one other to go!

Back "home".

The low growl of Raph's voice comes from the other side of the wall, he's most likely cursing me and trying to get in, but I'm too busy picking my way through the graveyard once known as Stockman's lab to really pay any attention. This was the heart of his experiments and creations, and I guess, my home, but now only destruction lies. The guys always said it collapsed, but it's not completely ruined, Stockman must have built it well. I explore the room with my eyes, treading carefully.

'_If I remember rightly, my room is…' _I twirl around, _'There.'_

I pick my way through the robot bodies and rubble, to a room on the other side of the room. I look through the small, tinted window, and just about make out a messy bed. The cool metal handle chills my hand as I open the door. Cold and tiny, just like in my dream, but the darkness fades the harsh white to a grey. I step inside, looking around in awe at this room I've spent the whole fifteen years of my life in. The tiled floor still as cold and the bed still as uncomfortable as always.

As I lay on my old bed, the past replays in my head, everything so clear now. I remember laying on this same bed, curled up into a ball, crying my eyes out. Memories flood back to me… sitting on my bed nibbling on bread, savouring the precious meal… screwing some Mouser robots together on the floor as Stockman ordered me too… an injection being stabbed into my arm as Stockman held me down… being collapsed on the floor as kicks repeatedly slammed into my plastron… I sit up, clutching my knees to my chest and rest my forehead on my arms, resting on my knees.

'_15 years of absolute torture.'_ I sigh and my mind races with all these different memories, all these different horrors. I sit in my misery, tears rolling down my cheeks, but no sobs escape my lips.

"Don'tcha know not ta run from the best ninja in the world? 'Cause, yanno, he'll find ya." That familiar rough voice fills the room, but something isn't the same. I look up at him, my eyes probably bloodshot, my face most likely filthy from the dust of the rubble and my hair in a tangle. I look away just to stare at the wall. The bed sinks beside me and I put my legs down to shuffle over, away from him. "Why were ya runnin' huh?" He says softly.

"Because I'm an animal, a monster, a damn mistake." I whisper.

I feel Raph shuffle next to me.

"I guess my brothers and I can think of ourselves at times. We're animals, turtles actually, and we're mutants, half human, half turtle. It's not even like we were made to be this way, we were mistakes too. I guess if Splinter were here, he'd put it down to fate. I ain't too sure on all that 'everythin' happens for a reason' shit though, but I know somethin'…" He stops and I look up at him. He seems different. His eyes look sad, but happy at the same time. He's not frowning, but he's not exactly smiling either. He seems tense, but at the same time completely relaxed.

"What?" I speak softly.

"I know…" He looks down at his hands, only to change his mind, looking back up at me, "I know that compared ta us, you're not a monster Karm, you're beautiful, you're the most beautiful person I've ever set my eyes on. From when Donny brought ya back from here, I set my eyes on ya an' my heart stopped. Ya were bloody an' filthy an' half starved, but I still thought ya were beautiful. Even though right now, you're filthy," he stops to put a hand on my cheek to wipe some dirt away, "an' you're in rags, with no care about how indecent ya look," he grins at me and I smile slightly, looking down at my torn pyjama shorts, "an' there's a misery in your eyes, even worse than when Mikey finds out there's no more chocolate ice cream." I have to laugh slightly. "Even after all that, ya don't know how beautiful I think ya are." Anger flickers in his eyes, "I'd enjoy killin' Stockman for what he's done ta ya, I'd do it so painfully an' slowly, I'd make him wish he were dead." The anger disappears from his brown eyes, and the same sadness yet happiness fills them again. "I'd do it for ya, say it Karm, an' I'd do it for ya."

"No. I don't want you to kill him. Trust me, he'll get his karma." I tear my eyes away from his. "Even if I'm the one to do it. But I won't let your hands be bloodied for me." We sit in silence, both stuck for what to say. "Can you tell me how you found me? That doesn't make sense."

"Well, I guess you'd like the whole story. The lair we live in right now hasn't been our home long. We had another place, but one day, these rock munchin' monsters came right through our home, collapsing a wall right in the middle of it." I shudder at the memory of helping put together those robots, and helping with the destruction of my brothers' home. "We got separated from Splinter, but managed ta get through ta him on his phone. Yeah he has one too for such things, he hates the damned thing. He told us ta meet at a sewer junction. We started making our way along the sewers when we found another collapsed wall in our path. We decided ta go topside, well, I went topside an' everybody had to follow. We were tryin' ta find the next manhole, an' some jackass had parked his van over the top of one in some alley. I rushed in as per an' tried ta move it, when these goons came out of the side door of the building by the alley. I had ta jump in the back an' they shut the door on me, driving half way across town. Anyways, my bro's busted me out but then these ninja surrounded us. Ta cut it short, we beat their asses, found Splinter an' he showed us the lair, our new home.

A few days later, Donny got one o' those Mouser robots activated again, an' he got it goin' back ta where it'd come from. We followed it until we came across April. We rescued her from those robots tryin' ta munch her like they did to the walls in the sewer an' had ta bring her back home. After her shock from the realisation that she was in the sewers with four giant talkin' turtles an' a giant talkin' rat, she explained everythin' to us. She was employed by Stockman, an' had helped him build the Mousers. They were s'posed ta be helpin' with the rat problem in New York, but she stumbled across the place out there." Raph motioned to the lab. "There were thousands of 'em, an' Stockman caught her sneakin' 'bout. He said he couldn't let her live now she knew his secret an' set those Mousers on her. The entrance we came in through was how April escaped into the sewers an' how we found her.

We decided ta get Stockman back for good an' gate crashed this place. Stockman set it to self destruct an' high tailed it out of here, an' we shortly followed. He must have known that it wouldn't trash the lab very badly, but it'd scare us away.

Anyway, Donny wanted ta come back the next day, ta see if there was any techno geek stuff he could grab. When we first saw the place, his eyes lit up. He was gone 'bout 20 minutes when he came back with an unconscious you."

I take in the information and I remember the last moments before waking up in Leo's bed.

"I remember now. I heard a lot of commotion outside, and picked the lock on the door to try to see what was going on. I realised that the lab was in chaos and tried running out. I tripped over some rubble quite heavily and hit my head on the floor. I don't know why I was passed out for so long though."

"We ambushed this place on the Thursday night, Donny found you bright and early Friday mornin'. I remember 'cause Mikey was still asleep. You prob'ly just hit your head hard and ya were pretty weak."

"I guess." I shrug. "My life is so screwed up Raph."

"It's not Karm, ya just had an unlucky start. You're safe with us."

"Why would you even want me to stay? I was created for your demise."

"But ya didn't carry it out did ya? Look, you're one o' us, I told ya. We all trust ya, we all know ya wouldn't hurt us. We'd kick your ass before ya did." Raph grins.

"I just… I don't understand that you could feel the same."

"Because I-" He stops abruptly and I look up to see the struggle on his face.

"Because what?"

"Let me take you away from here, this place is giving me the creeps." He gets up from the bed. I pause for a minute, to look around, then tug the necklace away from my neck. It shines dully and I lay it on my pillow. Sighing at my torn clothes, I make sure I'm not too indecent, before linking my arm with Raph's. He seems taken aback by this closeness, but doesn't pull away.

'_Sorry Raph, I'm holding onto you whether you like it or not. I need any security I can get right now.' _My mind says to him.

He guides me out of the lab, and with one last look at it, I push the bad memories out of my mind. We wander down the sewers and Raph stops by a ladder leading topside. He climbs up it first to push back the manhole cover and to help me out. I look up at the stars and moon, the crisp air clearing my head. Raph smiles at me, grateful to see me less bothered. He takes my hand and leads me over to some fire escape stairs on the side of a building. We climb up and sit on the rooftop side by side, with the bright moon looking down on us.

"This is such a beautiful sight Raph." I look at the city stretching before us, the lights twinkling in the dark.

"I always come ta this place if I need ta think. Ya can see Central Park over there." He points it out for me.

"Is it nice there?"

"Mm-hmm, but I won't take you there yet. Maybe we can sneak in there at sunset sometime. Yeah I'd be willing to wear clothes, just for you." He shudders playfully and I giggle. "Karm?"

"Yeah?"

"For… well I… you…" He sighs.

"You find it hard to talk?" I look at him.

"Yeah. That wasn't what I was gunna say, but, yeah." He rubs the back of his neck nervously. "What I wanted ta say was…" He looks down at his hands. "I… I… like ya." He closes his eyes. "I like ya, a lot. From the day I met ya, I've just wanted ta hold ya an' I've had ta use all of my strength not ta. I might be the strongest of my brothers on the outside, but not on the inside. I've found it so hard bein' around ya, an' I hate sayin' this 'cause all I'm expectin' is 'I like Leo' in return 'cause who wouldn't? He's damn perfect, why would you like a hothead like me? Shit Karm, I can't believe I'm sayin' all this, I **never** talk ta anyone an' here I am spillin' my guts ta ya when you're prob'ly wantin' me ta shut the hell up."

"Raph…" I say quietly.

"You like Leo."

"I _liked_ Leo. But, I realised he saw me as a little sister. He's nice and I could prob'ly live a nice life with Leo, but… one, I swear he's married to ninjitsu, two, his mind is constantly on his leadership and three, I'm just way too much for him to handle."

"What d'ya mean?" Raph looks at me puzzled.

"All of this shit with Stockman, it's made me so scared all the time. I get nightmares about him and some days I just want to lock myself away. Leo wouldn't be able to handle looking after me and practise his ninjitsu religiously and carry on his leadership. I feel like he needs somebody to look after him, to help him face all of that, and I couldn't do that."

"So I have no chance is what you're sayin'…" Raph mutters and looks away.

"Raph, you're so pessimistic." I smile. "And you're such a fool, I'm saying that I like you."

Raph doesn't register the last bit for a few seconds, but when he does, his eyes dart towards me, half frowning, half surprised.

"You… Did you just say that?"

"Yeah I did call you a fool." I smirk. "And yeah I did say I liked you too."

"But… I'm a hothead!"

"I like hotheads and I like you Raph, deal with it." Raph grins to himself and mutters something. "What did you say?"

"I said 'damn brothers', they told me ta just tell ya how I felt an' that ya felt the same. Right as usual." He rolls his eyes and I giggle.

"Raph, yanno that means you'll have to put up with me and look after me don't you?"

"Yeah, but d'ya know it means you'll have to put up with my temper, an' how I don't listen to anybody an' how I like goin' out bustin' heads?"

"Oh so I get the raw end of the deal!" I grin.

"Hey!" He grins back. "So… does this mean, we're together?"

"I only said I liked you ninja boy, not that I wanna be with ya."

"Oh, uh, okay." Raph's face falls slightly.

"But I do wanna be with you Raph." I smile and he smiles too. He slips a strong arm around my small shoulders and I cuddle into him.

"Thanks Kar."

"What for?"

"Acceptin' me for me. My brothers do, of course, but only 'cause they hafta, an' Splinter has ta. Ya don't hafta, ya chose to."

"You were the one who taught me about choices Raph." I smile.

"Yeah I guess so."

We sit looking across New York, snuggled up together. Raph seems uneasy and I wonder what about. I soon find out as he tilts my chin towards his face and kisses me. I enjoy the moment, then break away to speak.

"I wondered why you were twitchy." I say dazed and he gives me a cool glance. "C'mon, it's getting cold, and we should be sleeping." I wriggle out from under his shoulders and stand up.

"Ya mean sleepin' with each other?" He grins cheekily and I roll my eyes, kicking him in the shell playfully. Raph gets up and takes my hand, giving me another kiss before guiding me back home.


	15. Let what is past, flow away downstream

Authors notes- I do not own the TMNT or any of their compadres.

Thanks so much to all of my reviewers, Kyabetsu, Ruby Roo and Chibilover especially

Let what is past, flow away downstream.

Raph and I walk home, hand in hand, with me listening intently as he talks about his family.

"I know exactly what Mike will be like, he'll constantly be askin' "have ya got laid yet? Raph? Raphy boy, did ya get laid last night? Huh?" an' Donny will probably start thinkin' 'bout the chances of… well, whatever he can in our relationship…"

"Like the possibility of children?" I smile at Raph who's features turn from calm to absolute panic.

"Kids? Whoa no no no!"

"I didn't mean yet! Calm down. Besides, I think you'd be a great dad."

"Heh, if ya think so." I see Raph's mind ticking away still.

"What about Leo? What will he be like?"

"Pssh, Leo will just have that big cocky, smug smile on his face as if ta say 'I told ya so' an' then I'll have to live with him bein' right 'bout somethin' AGAIN."

I giggle and squeeze Raph's hand. He looks down at me and grins.

"How about Splinter?"

"I dunno, never really thought 'bout it seein' as we've never had any girls to go out with. Jeez, I thought I might hafta end up goin' out with Mikey ta get any action, an' I think I'd rather just chop off my-"

"Yeah, okay, I get the picture!" I giggle.

"I guess it's up to good ol' sensei ta know if we can actually be together. My bro's have no objections, I know that already, but, he might not approve. He might think you have no idea what you're gettin' into an' tell us ta cool it for a while at least. I just hope he don't."

"I'm sure he won't."

We wander the rest of way back home, both silently contemplating. We near the entrance of the lair, no noise to be heard. We go inside, Raph closing the door whilst I wander into the kitchen. I reach for the light switch and yawn sleepily. I startle as the lights flicker on, I register the figure sitting at the table, flicking his tail.

"Sorry _musume _I did not wish to startle you."

"It's okay sensei." I stand in the door awkwardly, realising what a state I must be in. Splinter eyes up my torn pyjamas as Raph comes up behind me, slinking his arms around my waist and putting his head on my shoulder. His eyes follow mine to see his father sitting at the table. He jumps, pulling away his arms, to rub at the back of his neck nervously.

"Master Splinter! Uh, you're up late…"

"I was waiting for the return of my besotted children." His old face creases into a smile. Raph and I look at each other and smile too. "I am pleased for you Raphael, Karma. I was wondering if you would find a suitable partner in one of my sons and I think Raphael could be no better for you Karma."

Raph frowns.

"Why sensei?"

"My son, I know in my heart you will help her grow and hopefully give her some of your confidence that she needs. I know you are not the most patient Raphael, but with Karma you must be. It is clear she needs somebody there for her and she has chosen you to do that. Do not take that for granted. She is your calming influence, your brothers and I have seen the change in your temper. Yes, whilst you still may not be as calm as Donatello, you are certainly not as fiery as you once were. I am very happy that you two have become one."

"Thanks sensei." Raph grins, slinking his arms around my waist once again.

"Thank you master." I smile.

"I would like to talk to Karma privately Raphael."

"Okay, I was goin' ta bed anyway. Good night Karm." Raph kisses my cheek and draws his arms back.

"Night Raph, sweet dreams." I turn to watch him leave and he winks at me. My heart flutters and I smile. Turning my attention back to Splinter, I take a seat opposite him at the table.

"What did you want to talk to me about master?"

Splinter exhales slowly.

"I sense you are still troubled by your past my daughter. Where did you go tonight?" He says, even though I'm sure he already knows the answer.

"I went back to Stockman's lab." I say quietly, avoiding Splinter's eyes.

"Do you know of what things were done to you there?" Out of the corner of my eye, I see his paws reach across the table to me. I give him my hands to hold, and with tears burning at my eyes, I look up at him nodding. "You must forgive and forget those who wronged you, even though you may encounter them in the future. I know you are finding it hard to find strength in yourself, but through Raphael, I am sure you will regain it. Something tells me you are not the person you could be. Give yourself time, and try to let the past go. As the Japanese proverb says, 'let what is past, flow away downstream'."

Tears trickle down my cheeks and I can't help myself getting up to throw my arms around Splinter's neck in a warm hug.

"Thank you, thank you so much, you don't know what you've done for me, I will always remember this generosity from you Splinter san."

"And I will always remember what you have done for my sons Karma, Raphael especially. You have a special place in his heart, as well as Leonardo's, Donatello's, Michelangelo's and my own." His paws stroke my shell comfortingly. I break away, still sniffling slightly. "You should rest now, you'll be joining the boys in their training tomorrow. Leonardo told me of the skill you showed whilst helping to rescue Raphael."

"Thank you sensei." I bow and hear him pick up his walking stick, as well as the tap on the floor from it as he moves towards me. He places a hand on my shoulder and I straighten up.

"Good night Karma."

"Good night master."

I exit the kitchen and make my way upstairs to my room. I decide to stop in on Raph just before going to bed, but as I stand outside soft snoring comes from inside. Smiling, I make my way to my room to change my pyjamas. I head to the bathroom to wash my face and comb my hair. As I look in the mirror combing my unkempt hair, I smile at the realisation that my life will be better from now on.

'_It's gunna be okay. Things are looking up. I don't have to go back to Stockman's, the boys won't let me… __I__ won't let me. I have my big brothers Leo, Don & Mikey… Then there's Raph… he's gunna look after me. I'm gunna be happy.'_

I wash my face and then grab a fluffy towel to dry myself. The murky water drains away down the sink and as I make my way back to my room, a sleepy Mikey makes his way to the bathroom. He rubs at his eyes, then grins sleepily when he takes his hands away.

"Hiya Karmy."

"Hey Mikey."

"I take it you were out with Raph." A devilish smirk comes to his face and I roll my eyes, smiling.

"Yeah I was."

"So…? Did ya get laid? Did ya? Did ya? Did ya?"

I punch his arm playfully.

"Mikey, you're such a lovable moron."

"And Karma, you're so weird, c'mon, you have the hots for Raph!"

I giggle and Mikey chuckles.

"They say karma is a funny thing, why should I be any different?"

"You shouldn't, we love ya the way you are." He grins at me.

"Back at ya, littlest big brother." I smile.

"G'night Karmy."

"Night Mikey."

We each go our separate ways, him sluggishly walking to the bathroom and myself walking in a daze to my room. I snuggle down in my bed and sigh contentedly, completely happy for the very first time in my life.


End file.
